Louisiana takes a good, hard, long look at her life and realizes just how blessed she truly is.
This story was borne from hearing a Chondra Pierce video, who talked about losing two sisters and the pain she went through. Very powerful and moving stuff!
This morning I woke up with something pressing on my heart; I had to get up (plus I had to get ready for work).
I immediately started praying, just as I always do, to get my day going with God. I have realized that if it were not for him, I wouldn't be where I am now.
God revealed to me that even with all that's happened in my life over the years, He still loves me and is always with me.
Even when circumstances of life threaten to overwhelm me (crying kids, aging parents, worrying about them, times spent with a sick or dying child in a hospital bed, financial worries, etc.), God somehow delivers hope when I seem to need it the most.
If I need food, He sees to it that it's delivered to me. If I need money for whatever reason, he somehow makes a way, and the money comes in. When I need an encouraging word or a message of hope, He sends people my way to give me that; I then feel a lot better afterwards.
God has given me so much in my life: a loving husband who saw to providing a family for me when it looked like I wouldn't ever have children, my beautiful rainbow of children that rely on me to raise them, teach them how to naviagate this path called life, to kiss their tears, hurts, fears away.
He's given me a church home where I am free to worship in any way I so please, a church where the gospel is preached every Sunday and Wednesday, and a church family who can love on me and pray with me when life's circumstances threaten to overwhelm me.
Why should I worry when I have all of this?
Why should I think of my own problems when I see on a daily basis problems that make mine seem minor? Why should I worry about bills when God somehow provides that extra bit of cash that comes in handy at times of lean financial struggles?
Compared to a lot of people, I have a life that is abundant, full. My husband doesn't drink or beat me habitually (we get into arguments once in a while, but no marriage is perfect; we've come to learn that over the years), my kids are good, decent, smart kids with good hearts and manners (most of the time), we have a beautiful home that is situated in a pretty part of town, and God's gifted me with song, words, parenthood, and the ability to make sick people better (or at least comfortable).
He's gifted me with compassion, empathy for the suffering; this is where my nursing career goes hand in hand.
When I feel sad, overwhelmed, I can always go to God, who can minister to my hurting heart.
I can do it at work, when I am on break (if I am not writing in my journal or talking to my husband on his days off from Wal*Mart and he's home), and I can pick up my Bible, read a verse that speaks to me, and meditate, think on what I have read, and apply it to my own life.
Somehow God always picks out the right verse for me to read, and it helps me get through the day.
Today's verse was Isaiah 40:31: "But those who wait upon the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings as eagles; they shall run and not be weary; and they shall walk, and not faint."
I needed to see that verse, hear that confirmation from God, because today, tomorrow, and Wednesday are going to be difficult days.
Tonight and tomorrow night is the wake for the son of one of our church members (he died nearly a week ago in the tornado outbreak that raked across the south; a tree fell on him; he was only twelve years old), and Wednesday is the funeral services at our church. I still can't believe that young Dominic Brownwood is gone; he was a wonderful young boy who had the love of the Lord in his heart. He will be missed by all who knew him.
We will have to be strong, be there for the Brownwood family, as they deal with this time of grief/mourning. It is a terrible time for them, for those who know them best.
I know how it is to lose a child: it is probably the worst thing that can happen to a person, even worse than losing a parent or a brother or sister.
A parent shouldn't have to outlive their child; however, it was God's decision to call them home. I've lost four children myself: a foster daughter, Rachel, to AIDS at the age of two years, and my three birth children (Aron Jakob, Pierre Armand, and L'Acadia Marie-Antoinette, who would be in their teens now, nearing the threshold of young adulthood).
I still miss them all deeply, especially on their birthdays or on holidays like Thanksgiving, July Fourth, or Christmas.
I know they are all safe in the Arms of God up in Heaven; yet the pain is still there. I still have my days when I think of them and end up crying because the pain is still there, tucked somewhere in my heart. I still miss them as much as I did on the day they died.
Well, I have to get back to work; break time nearly over. I will write in here again soon; take care and God bless! Know that He is always with you, that He loves you very, very much!
~Love, your friend, Louisiana Mayrah. :)
If there is anyone out there going through their own personal struggles, their own pain, know this: God is with you, always; He will never abandon you, no matter how bad things may look. And know that you are all in my prayers/thoughts!
I consider Isaiah 40:31 my life verse, thank you for sharing, this was very well written, my thoughts and prayers are with you and Karla
God Bless
Michelle~
I often repeat the phrase "an attitude of gratitude", but in this case, these words of fullness sound so empty by comparison with the grace, humility and overwhelming thankfulness you demonstrate in your Jounal entry here. I am deeply, deeply humbled. I am sure there are many who will be touched by the truth of these words and by The Word you bring before our hearts and minds through it. The greatest witnesses to the love of God on earth are those like you and Louisiana: joybringers of and to the Most High. I am sure His Light and Life will be present during the coming days of pain and confusion. Bless you as always. Kate xx
great story Karen, we all should be thankful for what we have, things can always be worse
Reviewed by Christi Anderson
2/11/2008
I cannot say enough about how this entry touched me. Karen you have lifted my spirit for the day. Wonderful expression of thoughts and feelings. Thank you for your talent!:-)
Can relate very well, parents shouldn't outlive their children, then again, in the life's lottery we don't choose the numbers, they are given at our birth, and yes, we should accept what have we got and not live wishing many a if...
When two men hit the reset button and decide to go out looking for the good in the world, they not only find it but also a lot more.
P.S. The title is listed on Amazon under Look for Something Good by Robert Drews (not by Robert H. Drews)
