Today was a beautiful clear morning, I sat in my enclosed garden once again
Sipping delicious herbal tea, enjoying the scenic background of my yard over looking
the wild animal and bird sanctuary wetlands, when undesired thoughts invaded my mind
Of a moment lost in time, I had suppressed for many years, when I was about seven or eight years old.
My mother dispatched my little sister and I, to a local grocery store owned by an old Italian woman in her mid 60‘s for some bread and milk, a sweet tweedy pie looking granny named Louisa, we thought her to be a gentle woman who always treated the kids with penny candy treats.
On my way to the store, I found a woman’s watch on the sidewalk in front of my house
I place it in my pocket, while Louisa was taking my sister’s order I took the watch out
of my pocket to inspect it Louisa saw me, Mustering the sweetest voice imaginable asking me “what was that I had in my hands”?
As I began to show her, face change to that of Mr. Hide, snatching it from my grasp
Screaming at me, what are you doing with this you little spic bastard, where did you steal this from, with the same breath yelling for her daughter who was in the rear of the store, she appeared immediately still wearing her high school cheer leader’s outfit, she was
beautiful about sixteen and towered over me.
Louisa gave her the watch saying this little spic had your watch, baffled she looked at the old witch, exclaiming “My watch”?, so obvious even I as a kid knew it wasn’t hers, yes your watch, he said he found it on the side walk on the way here, the beautiful cheer leader, realizing the unfolding larceny at hand, placed the watch around the loveliness of her wrist, disappearing back into the rear of the store.
Leaving me standing there in the middle of the floor, people staring at me, embarrassed and with a tear on the edge of my innocence, flabbergasted wondering what had just occurred, how could I had been accused of stealing and why did they take away the watch I had found.
Yes I did say she was in her mid 60’s, back then when I was just a child of seven or eight,
Now I am in my mid 60’s and still I am unable to find it within my heart to ever forgive that old bitch, all I can say is that I hope she is still burning in the hell she made for herself along the way.
WOW! WHAT A RUTHLESS, HYPOCRITE AND CON ARTIST SHE AND HER DAUGHTER WERE. I CAN UNDERSTAND YOUR PAIN...THROUGH THE YEARS. I SEE THIS WAS WRITTEN IN 2008, 14 YEARS AGO. NOW, I AM GOING TO SAY SOMETHING THAT I HOPE YOU WILL UNDERSTAND AND THINK ABOUT IT. DID YOU KNOW THAT THE LITTLE OLD LADY AND HER DAUGHTER MIGHT ONE DAY STAND BESIDE YOU IN THE PRESENCE OF GOD...HAVING BEEN FORGIVEN? I KNOW IT'S HARD TO FORGIVE...ESPECIALLY WHEN THINGS ARE DONE TO ONE IN CHILDHOOD WHEN ONE WAS UNABLE TO DEFEND ONESELF. I KNOW BECAUSE I CARRIED A HATE FOR YEARS, FROM THE CRADLE WELL INTO ADULT-HOOD, UNTIL...I GAVE IT TO GOD. HE WAS THE ONLY ONE THAT WAS ABLE TO HEAL ME OF IT. I HAD TO FORGIVE BECAUSE I LEARNED IN GOD'S WORD THAT I WOULD NEVER BE ABLE TO ENTER GOD'S KINGDOM WITH THAT HATE IN MY HEART. I HAD TO LET IT GO. AND I THINK SOMETIMES WHAT HAPPENS IS THAT WE SEPARATE SINS INTO CATEGORIES; LITTLE SINS, BIG SINS, MEDIUM SINS, ETC. BUT IN ACTUALITY THERE ARE NO BIG OR LITTLE SINS...SIN IS SIN. WHEN WE CAN ACCEPT THIS THEN WE LOOK AT OURSELVES IN THE MIRROR AND REALIZE...THOUGH SINS DIFFER, WE ALL HAVE SINNED TOO. AND GOD HAS FORGIVEN US BECAUSE THRU HIS BLOOD AND REPENTANCE WE RECEIVED THE GIFTS OF MERCY AND GRACE THAT WASHES AWAY OUR SINS. YOU HAVE TO FORGIVE WILLIAM AND I AM HOPING BY NOW YOU HAVE. IT REALLY IS A BLESSING WHEN GOD ALLOWS US TO LIVE TO OLD AGE...SO MUCH IS COVERED BY WISDOM, TIME AND JESUS' LOVE. THINK ABOUT IT; HE LOVES THAT WOMAN. HE LOVES HER DAUGHTER. AND HE LOVES YOU TOO, EQUALLY. AND HE IS NOT WILLING THAT ANY SHOULD BE LOST. HOW DO I KNOW THIS? BECAUSE, MY FRIEND, I HAVE HAD TO REPEAT IT TO MYSELF A MILLION TIMES UNTIL AT LAST...MY SOUL, MY SPIRIT, MY MIND AND MY HEART...GOT IT. JESUS LOVES THE WORLD AND HE DIED FOR THE WORLD AND EVERYBODY IN IT... BECAUSE WE ARE ALL SINNERS. WILLIAM, I WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO WRITE THIS TO YOU IF I HADN'T AT ONE TIME BEEN CONSUMED WITH HATE. SO, I KNOW WHAT GOD CAN AND WILL DO...IF WE LET HIM. THANKS FOR THIS SHARING, WILLIAM. LOVE, BLESSINGS AND FAITH...HIS+INSPIRATIONS
What did your mother have to say to the lady who was calling you all those bad words? Did you get a chance to explain your innocence? Did you get in trouble by your mom. Did your mom and sister believe you? Thanks for share in your story, I would have been scared of that lady she seemed mean. If you can William I would appreciate it if you would write me back I would like to ask you a few questions if you don't mind.
Thank you for sharing such an intimate and vividly scarring childhood memory. I too can recall some ugly memories growing up but I have learned to make peace with them through the grace of my Lord Jesus Christ. The self respect, dignity and self love that has resulted through this divine grace and guidance has allowed victory over these trials and tribulations.
At the end of the day, I ask myself was that person's shortcomings/narrowness of mind/unloving actions/personal insecurity/twisted upbringing/emptiness/satanic influence etc.. worth my present and future peace of mind and heart condition that channels God's love and strength? Answer:NO! So I pray, forgive and give it to God. On the day of judgement, we will all give an account so better to keep the slate clean. God bless you today and always..Thank you again.
Oh! I can feel your pain as it triggers my own. I had two sisters who treated me like that. My innocence cried more times than not. But they must have harbored more pain than I, to have behaved with such viciousness, which they harbor still. Sometimes I feel sorry for them and think I have forgiven them. But sometimes my pain resurfaces and I feel angry again. I think it is extremely hard to completely forgive when the abuser has not yet grown into remorse.
William, the " Unforgiving" is so real, and touches me, yet I pray that you will find it in your heart to forgive the wrong that was done to you!! Thank you for sharing your story and for being real, people find hope when you are real. God bless you!!
Adults who abuse children, and that was a mild form of abuse, they never understand that the smallest amount of fear and anger pushed upon a child can be traumatic, and the effect of childhood trauma can last a very long time. A very good story, Willaim.
Reviewed by 000 000
12/8/2008
A cruel deed to an innocent child will not go unpunished...as we all will answer for our life. To wound a child so young and you have carried this memory for so long. Hopefully by writing and sharing it...the memory can be thrown in the garbage...where it belongs.
Predjudice is still in our world...it is just hidden better!
William,
Now here is a fine example of a woman using her prejudice in her favor. I've never understood why adults take advantage of kids. I enjoyed seeing a glimpse of the retired officer here, with the use of "My mother dispatched..." lol. At least you know you were innocent. I think you labeled her well. Hugs~
Sheila
You were so innocent of stealing the watch and that old lady was very rude to you and did not even thank you for returning it to the girl. Such people should not even be here to act like that. No thanks from her ever.
This short story was indeed sorrowful just simply sad.
The images of you and the entire scenario played across my mind like a movie. Just to think about how sad you must have felt and been broke my heart and I know yours was.
Awwww, well at least you were able to write about it.
Wishing you all the best and lots of love and happiness too.
...I believe we have all held moments such as these...the watch was un-for-giving...because you found it...yours to keep... and stolen....the memories never will be...but always there...unfair.
John
Hahahahahaha William, I know this is a painfull memoery but I can't help imagining how that little lady looked like. Hope you one day forgive her, she has paid in full for what she did to you trust me...
You just took each and every one of us back to that one horrible moment in our childhood that has made us who we are. Yes, it was terrible but I am sure gave you a resolve to never, never inflict that sort of pain on a child. With that in your heart your life as we know it now was formed.
That old bitch helped make you who you are today.
Ironic, isn't it?
--RaeLynn
Sad remembrance, William. But don't you see? SHE had to accuse YOU in order for her theft from you to appear true; she had no shame. Forgive her now for the lesson you learned: thieves come in all shapes, sizes, and ages. Hope you didn't have to go back to that store!
William,
So vivid your memory of a traumatic moment in your childhood. This came to the surface now, because you are able to handle this. Look you wrote about it, got it out and now it will not be such a painful memory any longer. We here at AD, will tear her apart! lol There is justice in this after all.
Hope all is well, miss you much.
Peace, love, and light
Amber "V"
I had in my childhood a teacher that had made her life's goal to make my life miserable, she did, almost, I was one of those little firecrackers that took shit from nobody once they crossed that "patience red line"
But to my satisfaction, I heard that she, in her death bed wanted to say sorry for making me her special witch project.
As PeeWee said, it its amazing how we can't forget.
It often amazes me just how powerful some of our childhood memories are. Some of them seem to stay with us forever, and when we recall them, they seem like they just happened yesterday. And I hope you can find a much more pleasant one today, my friend.
It is so unfair, when people jump to conclusions, and usually they have no idea what the true details are.
When people look at me, they automatically think I starve myself in order to be the size I am, when in reality, I have to eat about every two hours, and the people who knoe me very well can back me up.
There is a difference in jumping to conclusions and going by instincts, I was accused of jumping to conclusuion just recently, no I said, I was going by my instincts and they were right, and I caught my ex-boyfriend seeing other women from an onlime dating service, but of course, he won't admit it, but instincts have kept many people alive, espcially when you are a person in law ennforcement,
"We walked in on a surreal scene. There are few words, if any, to accurately describe the abject horror..."
What Jeannie and Kevin McDonough saw was a wanted, multi-state serial killer about to take his next victim - their own daughter. W
