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The Front Porch Goose by Steven Cleaver
Tuesday, April 29, 2008
Rated "G" by the Author.
The story of a boy, two bullies and a goose that comes to life.
PLEASE WRITE A REVIEW IF YOU GET A CHANCE. I'D APPRECIATE IT.
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Reviewed by alex dihes (алик дайхес)
8/1/2008
after reading, i've got an understanding thay you do have an understanding how to write.
yet, the pieace is not composed: the idea you want to convey to me is unclear. the logic of narration is limpimg. the explanation of the attacking guys by genetics is out of line and brings unnecessary excuse. the conversations are to many and mostly irrelevant to the action -- could be easily snipped. there is no explanation of the meak behavior of the main character. all the geese and lion take away my concentarion yet they if they tell something, soory, i did not get it or worse have to do a job you are as the author have to do.
read more o'henry, checkov, maupassant, balzak, zola, gorky...
on my turn. i'd like you to ask you for a review of my works. i need no praises. i implore a censure the harshest the better. show my any my error from commas and articles to the narration.
I reviewed it and got as far as the wrought Iron Lion. That boy surely was overteased by those two boys. I know about those goose's or geese you put on front porch and dress up. Always wanted to own one. Can buy them in Ohio, saw lots when up to Church Retreat. ANyway, it came alive and scared the boys away for a time. They came back and still waved bats and teased him. They did damage to the goose, and that was bad for the boys. He should of told his Mother, Instead he did not, keeping the fact the boys tease him to himself is hurtful. Anyway the good luck amulet was a lucky charm once for him. And when he brought that iron lion, that should scare the boys away, cause they are fierce looking and they should soon learn he has a lucky charm piece to ward them off and they aren;t going to win out in the end. Big bullies end of off to jail or being caught out in the end.
The third in The Seventh Circle Series. Join the Seventh Circle and friends as they battle against the forces of the Black Order, the four demons, and contiune their quest to find the Soulstone.
Zahrellion, Rikky, and their dragons, embark on a quest to find the special mushrooms Mysterian needs to save Prince Richard from Gravelbone's poison.
Meanwhile, Jenka and his loveable dragon, Jade, escort the King's Rangers back to Kingsm
