The Day I Ran Away From Home

      That morning in October 1944, the day had started off warm and still. It was Saturday and we weren’t going to town that day. Mother and Daddy weren’t going. Not enough money to buy groceries. The weather was very warm for an October Saturday. Maybe a cool front would come in that day and bring some rain. Everyone was in a bad mood and it was a very bad day for me! I was 12 years old.

       Mother was not in a good mood. I can’t remember if it was because Daddy had yelled and cussed at her about something before he left on the tractor to go work in the field, or if I was fighting with my sisters about something. All I know was it seemed everyone was against me! I got yelled at for no reason! I even got a spanking. Mother didn’t spank us too often, but if she did, it was with a peach tree switch, which WE had to go and get ourselves.

       My legs red and stinging, with the red welts on my legs, I ran out of the house crying. It wasn’t my fault. It was never my fault of course! I felt so abused. I walked down to the barn and out towards the pasture, thinking, and crying. I stepped in a pile of chicken manure, which made it even worse. I had to stop and scrape it off my foot, and wipe my foot in the hay back of the barn. I opened the barn door and went in, sniffing the cool musty smell of the hay and corn in the barn. First looking around for spiders and bugs and maybe even a snake, I crawled back behind the pile of corn. I lay there thinking about my bad morning and began to cry even more, self pity engulfing me.

 I knew my brothers and sisters were still at the house finishing up breakfast and helping clear the table and doing the dishes. I could hear them as they came out of the house to go play. I decided to stay there and decide what to do. A couple of hours went by and I dozed awhile and then began to make plans. I know! I will show them! I will make them think I have run away from home. They will think I am lost in the big pasture next to our farm. They would all come looking for me, calling, “Lois, Lois, where are you?” Mother would be crying and looking for me, feeling really bad she had spanked me and yelled at me.

 The day dragged by, but no one came looking for me. I heard the sounds of my brothers and sisters hollering and laughing in a game of cops and robbers. I knew a Texas Norther had come through, because I could hear the wind blowing through the cracks in the barn and it began to get cooler in the barn behind the pile of corn.  

 It was past noon, I knew because my stomach began to rumble, from hunger, but still no one came looking for me. I kept listening for the barn door to open and someone to ask, “Lois, are you in there?” But still no one came. I know! I bet Mother has gone into town to get the sheriff to help look for me. Her face was probably all sad and worried. I nestled down again in the corn, enjoying my daydream, and fell asleep.

      I woke and knew the sun was low because there were deep shadows in the barn. I could hear Margaret and Jr. in the pen next to the barn, doing the milking. They were laughing and talking. Someone came into the stalls next to me, gathering eggs from the nests there. It sounded like Sister and Bubber. They weren’t even talking about me. No one seemed to be missing me.   

      I heard the sound of the tractor coming and I knew Daddy was coming in from the fields. I waited. Things got quieter. Darkness moved into the barn. I got up from my hiding place and crept to the door. I opened it a crack and peaked out. There wasn’t a sign of anyone. I could see the shadow of the tractor against the sky where the sun had gone down in the west. There was a faint glow of light coming from the window at the house, and I knew they must have been getting ready to sit down for supper.

 I stepped out of the barn and began to walk slowly toward the house. I stood by the big gnarled mesquite tree by the smokehouse, and watched. As I got near the kitchen window, I could see inside. Everyone was gathered around the big long dinner table, with the two long benches on each side, all the kids lined up on them eating. They were all eating and laughing and talking. Mother was passing around the fresh hot rolls she had baked, and Daddy was pouring syrup in his plate along with a huge pat of butter.  

  My mouth was watering and I was so hungry and thirsty. I was chilled by the cold wind coming in from the north, and shivered as I watched them all drink their big glasses of milk. I wanted to be there so bad. But no one had missed me! What should I do?

 Finally, I gave in and walked around to the front porch and came in through the front door, not saying a word, and walked over to the table and found my place on the end of the bench. Margaret scooted over for me to sit down. Mother handed me a plate with some rolls and butter and syrup, and poured me a glass of milk from the big earthen pitcher on the table. Everyone just kept on talking and laughing and they all acted like I had never been gone. It was if I had been there all day. I pretended I had been there, too.

   The incident was never mentioned again. I never asked anyone why no one had looked for me. I think maybe I was afraid they would say they hadn’t missed me! Were my brothers and sisters happy that I wasn’t there to boss them around, being the oldest? Did Mother really not miss me, with so many kids around? Or did she see me go into the barn and tell the rest of the family to just ignore me; she knew I would come home? I think it was the last reason! I never ran away from home again!