Friday, September 5, 2008, 3:22 a.m., D.S.T., Nashville, TN~

Dear Journal~

Louie here.  Can't sleep; too much on my mind.  I hope you understand.

Well, Billy Ray, our foster child, has been here exactly one week and a day now, and I don't know if we made the right decision in taking him in.  That child is undisciplined, spoiled rotten, disrespectful towards us and other people, and destructive. 

Just yesterday I had to put him in time out when he kicked my little Pomeranian.  She wasn't hurt, thank God, but now whenever Billy Ray goes towards her, she runs away, yelping like she's getting killed.  He also pulled the cat's tail, and "Cajun" hissed at him, tried to scratch him (she missed).  She runs away from him, too.

I don't know where he gets the right to abuse our animals this way, but I've got to draw the line.  I've got to teach him how to treat animals, let him know, in no uncertain terms, that I will NOT tolerate outright disobedience or abuse of our pets!!

Every time we try to admonish him for his bad behavior, he'll tell us, "You're not my mother!!", and I tell him, "That's right, I'm not", then go on and tell him that I will not allow him to behave in this manner.  I tell him he can't get away with what he's gotten away with in past foster families.

I can see why he's been shuttled from one foster family to the next.  The boy is seemingly unreachable, totally without remorse, gregarious, and impossible to live with.

This is when I ask the Lord to give me more strength, patience with this child because it's only been a week, and already it's wearing mighty thin!

The kids don't enjoy having Billy Ray around.  I can see the tension in their faces, and I know some of them are thinking, Why, mom, why?? Why did you take him in??  He's a brat!

One of the last straws occurred the day after he arrived.  He locked us out of the house; it took over an hour of pleading with him to let us in; when he finally did, he laughed about it.  I was ready to kill him, I was so angry!! 

I wouldn't do any such thing, but that child has got to learn how to behave, and he's got to learn right from wrong!!  He's got to live by our rules, and if he doesn't, he will have to go back because there's only so much I can take!!

I've put up with a lot of guff as a parent, but one thing I will not tolerate is disrespectful children!! 

Well, on to other things: 

Wayne is out of ICU; he's feeling a lot better, but he's extremely weak; it's going to take a while before he recovers from his heart attack.  He'll probably remain in the hospital for at least several more days.  He scaerd me; I was so certain he was going to die!

His sister, Audrey, is doing well; she is enjoying her new baby (a boy) very much, adding chaos to an already busy household.  Her family is growing by leaps and bounds, almost like ours!! LOL  It is so nice to see Audrey being happy; if anyone deserves to be blessed with good things, it's Audrey!

Gustav is now history.  Now there's Hanna threatening the Eastern seaboard, then the bad boy, Cat-4 Ike, who may come ashore sometime next week.  He could rival Katrina or even Andrew or Camille, in terms of strength or disaster potential.  That one could come to the Gulf; and the Gulf Coast region is still cleaning up after Gustav (and dealing with the ramifications of Katrina, even three years later).

Not good!!

Work is going well, but it's--work.  Long hours at the hospital, sore, swollen feet, the indignities of putting up with doctors who think they're God, difficult patients, or the inadequacies of inept co-workers are taking a toll on me, my conscience.  I'm grateful to have a job, don't get me wrong; however, the good days are becoming fewer and farther between!

I'm never so glad to see my family at the end of the day!

This weekend, I work.  No church in the morning.  I can go in the evening; all hope is not lost.  :)  I hate missing church in the mornings; it totally screws up my schedule!

Tomorrow I work from 6 a.m. until 5 p.m.  Long day!!

At least it gives me some time away from the trials at home!  That's a huge blessing right there!

Well, since I'm off today, I'm going to go back to bed; I might as well take advantage of all the sleep I can get before the troops (and our little guest) rise to greet the day.  I will write in here again soon; until then, take care and God bless!  Keep me in your prayers, as I can use them!

Thanks!e, your friend in Tennessee, Louie May. :(