Tuesday, October 14, 2008, 5:27 a.m., M.T., Denver, Colorado~

Dear Kierra~

Sagie here. 

Thank you for your letter; it was nice to hear from you.  I will, however, try to tone down the cursing, just to please you, make you happy. 

I'm sorry I'm so bitter:  it's just life has kicked me to the curb, and I don't know how to react.  I've had so many bad things happen to me it's no wonder my attitude is the shitz!

I know it probably isn't my fault that my parents ditched me when I was a little girl, and my Granny did try her best to raise me right.  I guess I should have appreciated her more when she was alive; she did try to teach me about God, making the right choices.

When she died, Uncle Fenton (as well as his wife, Aunt Reba) were kind enough to take me in, so I'd have someone to help guide me through the remainder of my teen years; I should be more grateful to them.  Instead of thanking them, making their job easier, I'm being pigheaded, and I guess this is one of the reasons why I'm so coldhearted, bitter, unforgiving.

Granny (as well as Fenton and Reba) tried their best to teach me about Jesus, but I swept Jesus away, as though He was some dust to be swept underneath a rug.  I guess I am getting what I deserve.  I haven't been very nice, and I've refused to answer Jesus' knocking on the door of my heart.  Maybe this is why I am going through the stuff I'm enduring now.

I've tried to read Karen Kingsbury, Dee Henderson, Mary Higgins Clark, and Lurlene McDaniel; those books only put me to sleep.  I see nothing wrong with R.L. Stine or Stephen King; they're just authors, and what they write are just books! 

On to the heart of the matter:

Are you saying that something bad is going to happen to me in order to change my mind about life?  That isn't very nice!  I don't call being crippled, sitting in a wheelchair for the rest of your life a reason to be happy!  You call that a life??  How can you possibly be happy, knowing that you've lost your legs, and you have to have people do things for you?  I don't think I could handle something that major; I'd have committed suicide!!

Maybe something bad did have to happen to you in order to change your attitude, but it's not going to happen to me.  I won't let it!  If you think that you can scare me by telling me something bad's going to happen to me, then I might as well break this off right now!  I don't want to hear of it any more!

How can you call yourself a "Christian" when you tell people that bad things are going to happen?  You should be praying for only good things to happen, not bad!  That sounds like you're contradicting yourself!  It doesn't make any sense whatsoever; it all sounds so stupid, so pointless!!

Well, Kierra, I will go now.  Have to get ready for school; takes me a while to do my makeup, fix my hair, find the right choice of clothes.  Take care and thanks for trying to be my friend; I appreciate it!

(((HUGS))) and love, Sage. :)