Lizzie is ready to take the dare.

A chilly November morning, the parking lot was filled to capacity, car engines idling and the smell of fumes, permeates the air.

"Never mind that", Lizzie says to herself. She buckles the leash on Sassy, her pet poodle. Sassie is dressed up for church this fine Sunday morning in a crimson red for the holidays, with tiny diamond studs at the bottom of each leg. Sassy is looking mighty "fine" for a poodle, all attitude!

" Just wait until  they all see Sassy in church today!", Lizzie smiles as she walks toward the church entrance.

Sassy struts like a peacock into the church that day.

Oh the looks they get as she and Lizzie went down the aisle to the very second pew and sat. Lizzie wants the first pew
but it was taken by a very fat woman wearing a hat full
of fruits--apples, bananas, cherries and pears!

"What an odd hat!", Lizzie said as she taps the woman on the
shoulder.

"What you say young lady?", the fat lady said as she turns
to look at her.

"I said you have a very odd hat!"

The woman laughs.

"That's because I am an odd lady! I eat when I want, what I want and I love my hat!"

Sassy stares at the hat while the organ music starts
to play.

The fat lady with the odd hat turned once again and
pointed at Sassy.

"Why did you bring a poodle to church today? You know they are not allowed in here. I wonder why nobody stopped you!"

I took a dare! A whole twenty dollars.
So far so good. By the way what is your name, fat lady?"

"It's not fat lady!", she says, with a giggle. My name is Margie
and I love being a fat lady! Most people think I am obese but
I just like being fat. I jiggle when I run. That's the fun part!
Don't ever be ashamed of your body no matter what people say okay ? You didn't give me your name, young miss with the weird dog.

"My name is Lizzie and here is my pet poodle Sassy."

The fat lady stuffs some cake in her mouth, licking the frosting off her fingers and crumbs falling on her lap.

Sassy's eyes dilate and she starts to drool.

The music fills the church and the procession of priests lectors march forward toward the altar.

"All rise", says the priest to the congregation.

In the silence to follow, Sassy, breaks loose from the leash and leaps into the front pew, diving into the "goodie" basket filled with the best eating since Eve bit into that Apple.


The "odd" thing was that Sassy didn't want the cake, she leaped up and the odd hat with the apples, pears and cherries fell off the fat lady's head!   The elastic of the hat went under Sassy's neck and over her eyes
as she ran blindly around in circles with that silly hat stuck on her head

There was a sudden hush as the whole church's eyes focus on the very first pew.

The fat lady rushed up to Sassy , this was her favorite hat....

The hat fell off her head, Sassy stared at the odd hat for a minute then at the fat lady....back and forth

just when it looked like she was going to get her hat back...

Sassy rushed forward, grabbed the odd hat once again

What was heard next was the stuff for church legend for years to
come....

"Noooooooooooo! Not my favorite hat!!"

and the dog ran away with the odd hat with

the apples, bananas, pears and cherries...

What a silly seeing a fat lady chasing a poodle up and around

Sassy ran outside quick as can be and buried the

odd hat under an apple tree.

The fat lady was out of breath before she could get to the

front entrance and went back to her front pew for

more cakes...

Maybe tomorrow she will buy an even odder hat!