I wish I could say I go elsewhere for the upcoming Christmas holidays, or at least spend it with the ones I love.

The sad truth is, I don't have any family.  It's just me and the dorg, my faithful companion, "Trixie".

Name's Helena.  Helena Edwards.  I'm sixty three, look (and feel) more like eighty or so.  Arthritis, hardening of the arteries, high blood pressure:  y'know, the typical ailments of getting older.

I'm also blind.

Lost my sight twenty years ago when a robber hit me in the head, caused me to fall; fall caused me to lose my sight.  It was a very bad time for me; it's only been in the last five years or so I've come to terms with my handicap.

Had to learn to do everything relyin' on my remaining senses, plus learn to use a guide dorg, get around.  It wasn't easy, but I did it; now I'm (pretty) self sufficient.

I used to have family, but my husband, Walter, died last year, and the kids don't call or check up on me, to see how I'm doing.  Ever since I became disabled, they don't want to have nothing to do with me; they're too busy livin' their own selfish lives. 

I still cry sometimes when I think of it; I'm missing the opportunity to see my grandkids, get to know my kids again.  As I said, it's just me and the dorg. 

We live in a seedy apartment here in Vidalia, Georgia; it's an apartment complex for people with disabilities; however, it's in a pretty bad part of town.  Lots of crime, drugs goin' on 'round here; it's not safe to venture out at night; I mainly stay in in the evening time. 

'Course, I have my dorg to protect me, but he's more concerned with befriending people, which annoys me; he's supposed to be my eyes, not lickin' people to death!

One of these days I'm goin' to end up getting hurt or robbed!  I've already been there once; I don't care to do it again, thankyouverymuch!!

I love Christmas, but then again, I don't.  Why enjoy the holiday when nobody comes to see you, let alone, call me to see how I'm doing, or even send me a card?  I haven't had a card sent to me in years; and for me, my Christmas is staying indoors, listening to the music, trying to remember how it was before I came to be blind.

I miss those halycon days of yore; what I wouldn't give to relive some of that magic again!!

Well, the dorg is whinin' to be let out; guess she has to go toilet.  I will write in here again soon;  until then, may you have a merry Christmas, think of us lonely people in the world, say a prayer for us!  We could really use 'em!

God bless you and thank you for listenin' to me.

~Helena.  :(