Ingrid Schoenfeldter tries to cope with her failing health as best as she can. She has progressive muscular atrophy.
Ingrid Schoenfeldter here. Sorry if I haven't written; just haven't felt like it. I hope you understand.
For starters, I am still grieving my father's passing. He died back in November; the memories still cause me to cry at the most inopportune times. I can be fine one minute; the next, I'm bawling my eyes out.
I also am coping with my body. I have a progressive muscle diseaase that's causing me fits. I am getting weaker every day it seems; it's getting harder for me to get around without falling down. I can't tell you how many times I've fallen this past week; I'm all covered with bumps and bruises!
I have had to resort to using those damned crutches, but think I will be using my wheelchair before too long. My family's dismayed at the change in my health; it upsets them.
They have tried to be supportive, but I personally feel they don't want to be around them because they know I'm getting worse, and they act like I'm dying. It's really awful!
I haven't skiied this winter; I miss being out on the slopes with my family/friends! This is probably the worst part about having this stupid disease! It's wrecked my life!!
I did not celebrate Christmas. I just stayed home, felt sorry for myself. Not the best way to be, but since father died, I haven't had the heart to do much of anything. My house is a disaster, and my emotional state isn't much better.
My brothers and sisters tried to get me to come over for Christmas, but to no avail. I just shut the door on them, told them to leave me the hell alone.
They've been trying to get me to come over, but the truth of the matter is, I don't want to see anybody right now. I just want to be by myself, where I can think, try to get a handle on my life.
Well, I am going to lie down; I have a headache, and I'm threatening to cry again. Damnit, I hate these wild emotions! Why couldn't I go back to the life I had before I got this stupid PMA or before my father died??
Just say some prayers for me; pray I get through another day without going crazy!! I'd appreciate it!
~Love, your friend in Norway, Ingrid Schoenfeldter. :( >tears!<
Feeling sorry for ourselves only add to the misery, illness should be hurdles on the life's run dash, after it, the steeled soul done by a strong willing will get a long road ahead without a dust corn of self pity.
Sounds like Ingrid needs a good cry and a friends shoulder, and a large dose of faith, I know what living with a Muscle disorder is like, but if you don't fight, it will win, so fight!
In Christ's Love
Michelle~
Sounds like she is going into advanced stages of depression and it may be time for her family to step in and take control. We as individuals cannot always see just how bad we are sinking.
I know what Ingrid is going through with the loss of a parent only time can heal your pain. As for your body, never shut your family and friends out as they are your support, they are the ones who love, worry and care for you, believe me they will be your strength. I hope she finds the strength to pick up the phone and call them. This is a great write Karen, thank you for sharing.
Emotional storms ... all part of grieving. For a Daddy, lost, for a body, betraying - all perfectly understandable. BUT: she needs to realize that prolonged depression needs to be addressed. :) Still and all, an excellent write - well done, Karen.
(((HUGS))) and love, Karla.
Reviewed by Flying Fox Ted L Glines
1/17/2009
Great wake-up call for those who think their life is difficult. Ingrid will have all of our prayers, especially a prayer for a miracle in her life. Thanks for this one, Karen!
Exploring the impact of literary icon Flannery O'Connor's noted legacy on the cultural realities of modern-day America, the world, and a certain author.
Exploring the impact of literary icon Flannery O'Connor's noted legacy on the cultural realities of modern-day America, the world, and a certain author.
