If you think things have gotten better with me, you're sadly mistaken. If anything, things have gotten worse.
It's me, DeShawn Perkins. The one other people call "Dangerous". I guess it's because of my attitude, but I don't give a flyin' f***. If you've had to go through what I have had to in life, than maybe you can understand why I have such a shitty ass attitude about things.
As I said in my previous entry, I am sixteen, yet I am the man of the house. I work a few nights a week as a pizza delivery boy; where I live isn't the best of areas; I run the risk of getting beat up, talked into trying drugs or joining up with a gang, or worse. If anything, I could very well end up dead if I don't watch my P's and Q's.
My granny's been beat up or robbed several times; the last time it happened, she ended up in the hospital, getting stitches in her face and her cuts, bumps, bruises tended to. She looked like someone who'd gone into the ring with Muhammed Ali or Oscar De La Hoya. She looked terrible!
I don't know what I'd do if those f*****' thugs got a hold of my two baby sisters, who are only ten and eight. All too often I hear of babies or tiny kids being shot up or stabbed, or teenaged boys (or girls) getting killed by drive-by shootings or stabbings from rival gang members. It's crazy here in the projects where I live!
People sometimes wonder why I carry a knife on my person whenever I go anywhere. Well, DUH! Look at where I live. I live in a hellhole of a neighborhood in a shitty apartment complex for low-income families, and nobody gives a flyin' fig on making things better for us.
Our apartments are falling apart, kids keep getting sick or shot, old people keep getting robbed or murdered, and rats carrying bubonic plague (and heaven knows what else!) scurry along the floors in the rooms, even in broad daylight.
You have to be tough to endure some of the crap I do, each and every day. If you don't, then you might as well be diggin' your own grave, plannin' for your own funeral, 'cause you ain't going to last a week here if you're not careful!
This is why I'm still here. I have learned how to survive in a world that doesn't cater to the lower class people, and if I want to try to get ahead, I'd best know how to defend myself, or else!
Well, Q'uirionka is crying again (think she found a rat in the toilet or in the kitchen sink again), so I'd best dispose of the ugly critter and try to figure out a way to get out of this damned apartment! We deserve much better than this!
~DeShawn Perkins, aged 16 (aka "Dangerous"). :(
~To be continued.~
