Washington D.C., April 9, 2009~

Dear Journal~

It's me, Blondelle!  Thought I'd write to y'all, let y'all know what's shakin'!

I have some very exciting news:  I tried out for "America's Got Talent" last month here in Washington, D.C., and (drum roll, please) I MADE IT!!  I have a chance to appear on television, with a good shot of taking a spot in the competition!!

I sang "His Eye Is On The Sparrow", just like I said I would, and I blew the judges out of the water!!  I was sooo nervous; however, it was only by God's grace that I got through it, and now I have a chance of making it to stardom!!  I am sooo happy I can do nothing but praise His goodness in my life!!

Maybe, just maybe, I can finally help my family escape the poverty that we've had to endure since I can remember; it would be nice to be able to live and not worry about a darn thing!!

I am still working at Cracker Barrel; my co-workers are as excited about my news as I am!  In fact, my boss said when "AGT" comes on they will have a watch party for me and cheer me on to victory!  They think I'm good enough to make it to the final round and possibly take it all!

My boss said if I make it he will give us nice, big fat raises!  Oooh, that would be cool!!

Even amidst all this joy, I do have some sadness lingering on in my spirit:  my cousin, LaShundra Michaels, was murdered the week of February 21, 2009:  she was a victim of a drive-by shooting; some stupid gangbangers mistook her for a rival gang member, and they shot her, in cold blood.  She wasn't doin' anything but standing in her front yard, waiting for the cab to take her to work.  She was only 18 years old.

I miss her so much; it is all I can do to keep from crying every time I think of her!  She had her whole life ahead of her:  she was planning on going to college in the fall of this year; she wanted to be a criminal lawyer.  She loved people, and she loved life, and lived it to the fullest extent of her being. 

Now because of hate and a terrible mistake, she now lies buried six feet underground in a cemetary not far from where I live, and I'm left with a horrible aching in my heart.  LaShundra and I, we were tight:  we were the best of friends besides being cousins; we grew up together.

I wish I could say we were doing better; some days are okay, but more often than not, we struggle to put food on the table, get our bills paid.  My mamma, she is working three jobs just so we can have what we need; I try to help by working at a busy restaurant, and my poppa, he gets disability because some drunken idiot ran into him and messed his legs up bad; he now walks on two canes and is in constant pain.  He got his first disability check last month after over 4 years of fighting, and it ain't worth what he deserves. 

And then my cousin LaShundra gets murdered.  The news hit us like a ton of bricks; we're still dealing with the aftershocks and the feelings of anger, guilt, shame, bitterness.  I am going to have to forgive the man who killed my cousin, but it's going to take a long, long time.

Well, I have to get ready, go to work.  Work tonight from four to close (10); hopefully I will make some decent tips tonight.  Pray that I do; we could really use the extra money!  Thanks in advance!  I will write in here again soon; until then, this is Blondelle signing off!  Take care and keep me in your prayers!  God bless!

~Love, your friend in Washington, D.C., Blondelle Hawkins.  :*(