Do you know the power of your words?
Some of us are born understanding the power of our words. And others just blunder along crushing people with our careless use of language. How we communicate has as much to do with our choice of words as it does with the delivery.
Words can make or break a person's day. Words can cause us to laugh, cry, despair, or feel joyous. They can affect your child's interactions for the rest of their lives.
I listen to the way friends talk to each other. Their words are a gage as to the health of their relationship and the legacy they are passing on to their kids. I was visiting friends I hadn't seen in quite a while. Married for ten years with two sons, Tom and Jane were the typical suburban couple - laboring under pressure and taking each other for granted. Tom was working in their yard. Jane and I were sipping coffee in their kitchen. He poked his head in the door and asked her: "What time is it?" Jane replied: "Do I look like a clock?" Had she answered me that way, I would have walked away from our friendship. Call me sensitive, but that was a mean-spirited response. I never forgot the incident.
Jane could have checked the time, but instead she wise-cracked Tom. Their six year-old son, Richard was in hearing distance. I figured he had listened to many such volleys. Richard is now in his early teens and both parents are upset and hurt by his lack of respect for them. They don't get it. They established the ground rules for how Richard will speak to those closest to him.
Pattie and Jack have a seven year-old daughter, Anna. "Love 'ya" is their mantra. Every conversation ends with it. It's become a throw away phrase. An over used exit-line. Little Anna refuses to say it, no matter how much her daddy begs. At her tender age, she is wise enough to know the words have lost their meaning from over use and under pronunciation. I am leaving after spending a weekend visiting her folks and playing dolls with Anna. She walks me to the door. I say my good-byes and in sign language Anna tells me, "I love you." But she will NOT say the meaningless words.
How many times a day do you say "Love 'ya?" and what the heck does that mean?
Mean what you say, say what you mean and don't say anything mean.
With love & laughter!
Barbara Silkstone
www.barbarasilkstone.com/
