Weds., June 10, 2009, Nashville, TN., 7:30 a.m. ("good morning!")~

Dear Journal~

Johnathon here.  Sorry if I haven't written in here for a while; still getting over my latest hospital stay (was in for about a week), not to mention, my surgery.  Had a PICC line installed, by my collar bone; it still hurts if I bump it or accidentally pull on the tube when its connected to the IV stand.  (Had that done on the first of June.)

I have to have special feedings of nutrients, to see if I can get some extra weight on me.  Let's face it:  I'm skinnier than skinny!  Even a telephone pole is fatter than me; I look like I just emerged from a concentration camp!  I look like a survivor of the Holocaust!  I.  Look.  Evil!!

I'm embarrassed to be seen in public.  My wheelchair just about swallows me whole, and my limbs are so skinny they look like broken sticks!  My clothes sag on me, and I am so pale, it's not funny!  I am feeling better (a little); however, it's going to take a while before I feel to where I don't need extra help in just about anything I do!

Just writing this is enough to wear me out.  Pardon me while I rest for a bit...be back...

Okay.  I'm back.  It is hard to do things; I'm getting weaker and weaker; this last hospitalization/surgery really knocked me on my tail!  Doesn't help when I have this darn neuromuscular disease; don't know if I will be strong enough to make it to camp this year!  If not, it would be the first time I've missed MD camp in years!  (Oh, I missed it last year; went to Louisiana the week camp was on; okay, so I lied!  So sue me! :P)

I realllly hope I am around for a while longer.  I just don't feel like meeting up with the angels or my Maker just yet.  Oh, I do want to see God face to Face, but let's face it:  I'm only sixteen; I've got waaaaaaaaaay too much living left to do!  I'm not ready to go just yet!  I keep praying like thunder for God to let me live another day!

So far it's working; I pray it continues to do so!

Mama is in Memphis:  she's helping out her friend, Kendra, and her family.  Their daughter, Holly, nearly died last week after slipping in a coma; it's only by a miracle that she survived. She's now back home (much to everyone's surprise), but now Kendra may have to go have her stupid shunt replaced; she's having those killer headaches again.  If it's not one thing, it's another, especially as far as the Kents are concerned!

Kinda like me, like our family!  :P

I am pissed:  we were supposed to go to Fan Fair last weekend; we ended up missing out.  Had tickets and everything!  I look forward to going to Fan Fair every year!!  It's officially the start of our summer vacation season; I've gone to quite a few Fan Fairs in the past; it's cool getting to meet your favorite singers, seeing them perform, and getting plenty of photo/autograph ops!

I spent this past weekend watching paint peeling off the walls.  Let's face it:  I was bored, bored, BORED!!!!

And since becoming sick/having surgery, I haven't done that much; it's too much of an effort!  Grrrr, I hate this stupid MD!!  I wish it'd take a hike; I want my old body back, the one where I could walk and take care of (most of) my needs!!!! :(

Now we have Ronee' 's stupid audition in Las Vegas coming up on the 23rd of June; she's flying with our daddy; she is trying to get a spot to be on tv or be in the semi finals (and hopefully) the finals of AGT.  Then people will be talking about "Ronee', Ronee', Ronee'", and I am SICK.  Of.  It!!!!

One good thing amidst all this gloom and doom: I passed my classes at school; I will be a junior come fall.  I am so glad school is done, but I sure started it off right (NOT!) by going into the hospital to have my surgery!!  Not a good way to start the summer vacation season, folks!  No sir!!

Hopefully once I recover from this surgery, I will stay out of the stupid hospital for the next million years!  God, I hope so; I HATE being in the hospital; it's a giant pain in my (skinny) tukus!!!!

Well, daddy is coming to help me get ready to start the day, so I will go for now.  Besides, I am having an issue with my stupid p-bag; I thinks I sprung a leak (*groan*)!  I HATE that!!!!  I will write in here again soon; don't need me, Mr. Killjoy, causin' spoilage to your fun!  Until later, this is Johnathon signin' outta here; take care now!

~Love, your friend, Johnny.  :/

Please keep praying for me; I could really use a huge miracle about now....thanks in advance!