Saturday, Jun3 13, 2009, Nashville, TN., 6:55 a.m., D.S.T.~

Dear Journal~

Louisiana here.  I'm afraid I'm not doing very well.  Oh, I'm fine, healthwise; it's just that I am growing increasingly worried about my son, Johnathon, and the feud between him and his girlfriend, Rebekkah.

Seems that Johnny wrote something down in his journal, and it's upset Rebekkah.  I don't know what he wrote, but I am going to get to the bottom of this, see if I can figure things out.

Now, Bill tells me that Johnny won't come out of his room, and whenever people try to talk to him, he screams at them and tells them to leave him alone.  I am worried that Johnny may be thinking of committing suicide; he's been extremely depressed for the past few days, ever since this first happened.

Bill is at a loss at what to do.  He isn't physically able to handle such events, and I am sure his blood pressure must be skyhigh with all the stress he's currently under.

I feel foolish because we were to be at the CMA Fest/Fan Fair this weekend, but I threw my tickets away, and now I wasted a lot of good hard-earned cash over something stupid.  Now I'm here; I felt I had an obligation to be here with Kendra while she goes through a bad time in her life; we're friends; it's only natural.  I'm, more or less, stuck.

Kendra did get some good news about her headaches:  her shunt is working fine.  They will be giving her shots once a week to help curb the headaches; so far it's seemed to have done the trick; she hasn't had a headache in several days (I'm surprised!).  So one less worry there.

I don't know what is going to transpire between Rebekkah and Johnathon; it's anyone's guess; only God knows for sure.  In the meantime, I am going to call the mental health counselor first thing on Monday morning and see if I can get Johnny into counseling; it sounds like he is in dire need of help.

Johnny has been a real bear lately, and it's getting harder and harder to deal with.  Boy, talk about your teenage angst:  Johnny has it real bad!!

The other kids have been fine; it's Johnny we're having problems with.  Usually he can get over his depression; this time, however, not so easy.  I'm afraid he's going to get so bad off he might try to commit suicide or do something else just as drastic (like pull out his PICC line, perhaps, or his trache tube??).  The way he's been feeling/acting lately, I wouldn't put it past him; I'm thinking he is ready to give up on life.

I don't know why; he's already outlived doctors' predictions by nearly 11 1/2 years, and he's done so much good for people.  He has been blessed with incredible musical and writing talent, and he has such a gifted mind!  He has proven to be a survivor, time and time again, and even with what life's dealt him, he still keeps on going!  It's incredible!

I think when I get back home, I am going to have to have a serious, sit-down, heart-to-heart talk with my son.  It isn't like him to act so irrationally!  I am really getting concerned about Johnny!  The way he's acting is scaring the beheebies out of me!!

Please keep Johnny (and us) in your prayers; also be praying for Rebkkah Cohen!  And continue to keep Kendra and Holly in your prayers!  We would all appreciate it very much! 

Thanking you in advance~

As always, your friend, Louie May.  :(

P.S.:  Will keep you posted on what develops in this situation!  I pray things settle down soon; I don't think I can take too much more of this drama!! 

~L.