I don't know how I am going to tell the children that I have lost my job.

I had been working at a factory as an assembly line worker; now, after ten years of employment, I have been laid off.  The reason?  Outsourcing.  They're sending our jobs to India because it's cheaper.

Angry?  You bet.  I am good and angry.  No, I am more than angry:  I am downright furious!  After ten years of loyal service, they treat me (and the other veterans of the place) like this??  How do you expect me to react??  Jump for joy??

I don't even think so!!

My last day was today.  I came home just a little while ago; I told the little woman I don't feel good (which I don't); she's now in the kitchen, making me a cup of hot honey tea and some toast.  I guess she thinks I have an upset stomach or something.

I am trying to work up the courage to tell her what happened.  I am doing everything I can not to burst into tears; yet when I think of what occurred, tears threaten to spill from my eyes.

I dread telling the kids that there might not be any room for presents.  If I do buy presents, they will probably come from a store like Big Lots or the Dollar Tree.  No Nintendo or Wii game systems this year.  No cell phones.  No music lessons.  Nothing but cheap toys, clothes, or whatnot.

I think the biggest thing I can get for the littlest kids are paint-by-number sets or coloring books that are on sale, or again, from a thrift or outlet store, because I can no longer afford the good, name-brand stuff.

I got my last paycheck on Friday.  I have already spent all but maybe $30.00 on necessities (gas, food, paying the bills).  I have to save the last $30.00 for Christmas presents for my family; after that, we will have nothing to live on.

I will have to go to the unemployment office tomorrow or the next day to sign up for unemployment benefits.  There's no guarantee I will even be accepted, or how long I will have to wait until the benefits start rolling in -- and that's only for a short period of time, unless I signn up to extend the benefits by several months.

If I don't get accepted, I will have to look for another job, or at least sign up for some sort of government assistance.  Again, there are questions as to how long that will take before I get help.  You know how "fast" the government is:  I do believe their motto is "hurry up and wait".

Ain't it the truth!

Then people wonder why I am angry at God, let alone the world.  Go figure that one if you can!  Merry Christmas to us!  No, bah the humbug is much more like it! 

I am feeling more like a grinch than a Santa Claus.