Deidre Brownwood here.  Sorry if I haven't been writing; things have been crazy at best.

I am glad to say that I am learning to move on past the death of my 12-year-old son Dominick's death (he died two years ago when a tree fell on him during a severe storm); I do have my bad days still, but they are starting to come fewer and farther between.  I find more reasons to smile now.

I am also coping with the ongoing problems of my son, Sam, 13 1/2; he continues to ditch school at any given opportunity, plus Kaylee, 17, has turned mean and sullen in nature; I'm dealing with her shitty-assed attitude as well.  It's not easy.  The only one who is doing better is Forrest, our 10-year-old; he has brought up all of his grades, and he is now doing very well in school.  Had Dominick lived, he would be turning 15 this year; he would have been our second oldest child.

We no longer have our cats:  we had to give them up when Roberrt's health deterioated to the point to where he needs assistance in daily tasks.  His Parkinson's disease has left him wheelchair-dependent and unable to feed himself because his hands shake so bad, as does his head and shoulders.  It's really sad to see how bad he's gotten; it's one of the worst things a wife can ever experience:  to see her once-vibrant spouse turn into a shaking, uncontrolled mess.

Robert is now in a assisted living facility.  I felt this was best; I didn't want to saddle the kids with helping care for him, plus the demands of caring for him were becoming too much for me to bear.  It was one of the hardest decisions we had to make as a family besides burying our son.

We are back at church:  going to Christ Community Assembly of God again (our home church).  We felt that life was getting too hard to cope with, so I made the decision to return.  Hopefully it will do my kids some good; they can really use a touch from God, to help them through the dramas and trials called life!

I am on speaking terms with Louisiana Sandusky, Bill Sandusky,  Kendra and Michael Kent, Rachel and Micah Cohen, and others; I still wonder about Audrey Callaway; it's been ages since I last heard from her.  It is good to know I have friends again, friends who genuinely care for me and my family.

I still wish we had our cats; we had several Maine Coons, who were the loves of our lives besides our children, but as I said earlier, trying to care for them, as well as the kids and a sick husband, got to be too much, so we gave them up for adoption; we gave them to the local pound, and we made sure that they went to loving homes.  I miss our furry babies more than you will ever know!

Maybe we will get a new cat (or two); it's too quiet here without Robert and the kids when they are at school or out at other places!

I have been involved in Compassionate Friends, which is an organization for bereaved parents who lost children; it's made a world of difference!  I don't know why I didn't connect with them sooner!  I have also been journaling, writing out my feelings about losing Dommy, and it's allowing me to heal, slowly, but surely.

Well, I have to go:  the phone is ringing, plus I am in the middle of doing laundry.  I will write in here again another time; until then, this is Deidre Brownwood saying so long and God bless!  Please keep those prayers coming; we can really use them, more than you will ever realize!  Thanks in advance!

~Sincerely, Deidre.  :)