I don't know why I stay with my wife ... she continues to pester me, asking me to come to church with her. 

I am getting more and more frustrated by the day.  I go and apply; everyone tells me one of two things:  either a.) they're not hiring ("we'll call you" ... yeah, right! ... ; they NEVER do!!), or b.) "the economy's bad" (no kiddin'!). 

It's like beating a dead horse.  Has no get up and go!  :/

Well, just to humor her, I went to church with her on July Fourth.  They had a special musical about "loving God and country".  I really wasn't impressed.  I felt very uncomfortable; I felt like everyone was staring at me.  I felt like I had the words, "Doesn't attend church", stamped right in the middle of my forehead.

The musical itself wasn't bad.  Actually, the choir that sang was pretty good, especially this couple (don't know if they were man and wife) who sang soloes during the concert.  The guy was a big, beefy brute with a bald head; his wife was this tiny whisper of a woman, but when she opened her mouth up to sing:  WOW!  She was good!  So was he!! 

There were also a set of ... sisters?  Twins?  Mother and daughter??  They looked a lot alike.  Anyway ... One was on crutches, and the other, on a cane.  They were not soloists; they were part of the backup choir.  They had such joy on their faces as they sang, and I remember thinking, "They're disabled; what would they have to sing about?"  It bothered me the rest of the day.  The look of happiness on their faces ...

I don't know what led me to do it, but I walked up to the sisters (?) afterwards and gave them both a hug.  They were very sweet. 

I was suddenly very uncomfortable. 

I felt like everyone was staring at me with accusing eyes.  Or maybe it was God, Himself, knocking on my heart, saying:  "HelLO!!  Are you missin' somethin' here, buddy??"  Maybe He was telling me in His own way that I needed to change. 

I felt dirty somehow.  Unclean.  I knew I had do do something. 

*to be continued.*