I'm so shaking-scared, I don't know what to do.

Last week, as I was doing my morning showering, to start the day, I was washing my left breast, when, to my horror, I felt what seemed like to be a lump.  I didn't remember it being there before.  I don't remember accidentally banging my breast against something or falling down and landing on it.

I did a quick self examination, to see if it was just my mind playing tricks on me.  Looked in the mirror: everything appeared normal.  Felt my breast again, hoping that the lump (or whatever was in there) was not there.  

It was.  I could feel it underneath my fingers.  It seemed about the size of a walnut.

Suddenly, fear coursed through my body.  My mind went back to the time where my own mother lost her battle with breast cancer.  Mom was sick for just about a year when the cancer spread to her lymph nodes and then traveled to her lungs, stomach, and liver, thus, killing her in the end.  Mom was only 43 when she died.  I was only a teenager.

I did what I had to do: I quickly toweled myself off, threw on a bathrobe, and went to my bedroom, where I picked up the phone and called my physician, Dr. Burney.  I told him that I had discovered a lump in my breast while showering.  I told him I'd lost my mother to breast cancer fifteen years ago when I was a teenager, and I was sure that I had it as well.

The good doctor calmly reassured me it could have been any number of things: a tumor, perhaps, maybe even a cyst.  More than likely, it was probably a cyst; still, he told me to come in at my earliest convenience, so he could check things out.  Dr. Burney knew that I was upset, and he did his best to try to reassure me and calm my fears.

Still, despite his good intentions, I was not convinced.  I was as scared as ever.  I was sure I had breast cancer.  Visions of my mother's bald head and pain/suffering danced in my head.   Suddenly Christmas meant nothing to me.  I had more pressing worries on my mind.

To be continued.