Charlie-The-Crazy.  That's what they call me.

Guess it's 'cause I'm touched in the head.  Have schitzophernia; I hear voices, do what they tell me.  Guess that's what made me end up in th' predicament I'm in 'cause I didn't listen to the doc or take my meds; they made me stupid and sleepy, so I now live life in a mental haze.

Don't know what's going on most of the time. Maybe that's for the best because the world sure is a bad place anyway as it is.  I have my mind to keep me company, me and my voices that I hear in my head.

I am homeless.  Been that way for years; it's all I ever known.  I have my ratty clothes (and any blanket I can find) to keep me warm (plus on extra-cold nights, I sleep in a shelter).  Same goes if it's raining or snowing out.  If it's nasty, I'm doin' everything in my own power to find somewhere to hang out until the sun comes out.

I once had a life.  Was eighteen, but then started drinkin'; that messed my mind up bad, and I lost everything.  I only cared about the brown bottle; years later, I still find myself reachin' for it as a way to dull the pain in my world.  I've done too many bad things to even consider gettin' help; think I am way beyond that.  It's gettin' to the point where I don't even care if I even live or die; life's gotta be better than th' way I'm livin' now ...

Tried to work, but didn't like people tellin' me what to do, so I quit.  Been here on the streets ever since.  Not to worry: I have many friends here; met most at the shelter, but also met some at the Missions Church up the road a fur piece from where I stay.  Most are okay, but I really don't like bein' around people 'cause they make digs about my mind, and I don't like that none.

The only person who treats me halfway decent is Medusa.  Has a headful of hair that resembles a bunch of twistin' snakes; guess that is why people call her Medusa.  Still, she's a real nice lady; she laughs a lot, and she is always happy.  Wish I could be more like her, but me, I have too much pain, too mush sadness in my life.  Life for me is anything but good.

And with Christmas coming up, the last thing I need to be reminded about is getttin' something for someone else.  I can't even take care of myself; why should I even be able to afford to get anything for anyone?  I'm homeless, damnit; I have no money!!  I have nothing but my head and my invisible friends!  I also have Medusa and the others from the shelter, but mot are in as bad of shape (or worse) than I am!!

As far as I'm concerned, Christmas can kiss my lily-white ass!  I don't need it!!

Well, I've done it again: made myself cry again.  Seems that is another thing about me. I am so goddamned tenderhearted.  Why did I have to be one who cares so much??  I'd rather live in my own fantasy world and forget about life; real life only brings pain and disappointment for me!

*to be continued.*