Last week, I had a job interview in an area where I did not want to go. I think I have a phobia –a deep-set fear of driving alone on interstates. This fear is especially great when I think about travelling through Charlotte and beyond or North. My husband actually drove me to my destination a few days prior to my appointment. For him, it was a breeze. I thought, ‘surely I can do this.’
Friday came and my husband was out of town. I woke up very early around 3:30 am, glanced at my watch and quickly went back to sleep. I did this twice, probably subconsciously trying to over sleep! With no such luck, I got up at exactly 4:59 am.
‘Well, I thought, God must be wanting me to go through with this and so I got dressed, put on my Mary Kay look and sat down to spend much needed time with the Lord. He quickly directed me to Isaiah 41:10 which reads, “Do not be afraid for I am with you. Do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.”
Now this is a most encouraging verse in the Bible, so I bravely launched out at 6:15 am. I drove over to 521 and headed toward 485. However, when I came up to the exit, I pulled onto it, but just sat there watching the traffic below. I glanced in the rearview mirror, saw an opening and veered back onto 521. I guess you might say that I flat out…chickened out. I just could not do it! I could not make myself head down 485 W. and onto I-77 N. I wound up making a big circle intersecting with Hwy 51, Hwy 16 and back into my driveway. ‘What a wimp,’ I thought.
I beat myself up over this the rest of the day! My husband tried to assure me that it’s okay because I probably would not enjoy working 60 miles away from home anyway. He may have been right. ‘But what about the blessings that I may have missed out on by not going where I did not want to go,’ I thought? I realized too, that his attitude, although comforting at the moment, did nothing to help me confront my fear.
The next morning I woke up in my bed alone, since my husband was still out of town. I stretched my arms out as far as I could reach in both directions, enjoying the feel of the pulled, lengthened muscles when I glanced over at my right arm, this thought came to mind. “Jesus went where He did not want to go once. He went to Calvary—He stretched out his arms on the cross to die a cruel death for you and for me too.” And he did this out of pure love and obedience to God the Father and a deep love and longing for us to be with Him forever.
Shame overwhelmed me for a moment, and then I realized that I did not go on the trip so that I would be able to draw this conclusion today—to be able to relate this truth to you. The simple truth is that All of us will be faced with going somewhere at some time that we don’t want to go—whether it’s a short trip like the one that I was facing or on a longer journey requiring much more courage. We have to keep pressing on trusting that God is with us and that He will never leave nor forsake us.
As Joshua 1:9 reminds us…“I command you—Be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”
