Over and over again
you come to my mind
especially at night;

I replay our scenes,
I tell myself it is not right
to obsess.

But telling me this
only makes; you
come
for a longer visit
than if
I had said nothing at all
to myself.

I try to think of something else
but not to think of you
is to intensify
thinking of you,
and I get frightened
that I will flip again
into the endless loop
called thinking of you.

I am torn,
partly wanting to
even if part too
does not want to.

I hear my final sigh,
gentle excitement grows
and I can feel
that sweet surrender glow
and I give in,
I give in,
 I give in,

its exhilirating

to give myself
you,
even if
I first
resist.

And I take you in
like summer rain

drenched to my soul

 I splash you
up

with both

hands

my joy

for time

with you and I

is this

endless loop.

My feet hit the cold floor
in the morning time
and I dress in the dark
having only the glow

of you

for light.

To be continued.