Today I took several more steps, in my quest to learn how to walk again.  I may no longer have my legs, but I have my will and determination to reach my goals.  I am not one who gives up that easily.

Af tirst, I was depressed and angry at God, but then I got a good talking-to from the chaplain.  He said it was futile to blame God for what happened; it was his will, but out of this, something good would happen.  At first I didn't understand what he exactly meant, but now that I've changed my attitude for the better, I am beginning to take his words to heart and am finally beginning to figure it out.

I got my artificial legs about a month ago.  It has been a very long, drawn-out, and pain-filled process, but if I don't do anything to better myself, I'm just gonna fall back into that "poor, poor pitiful me" game and that would hinder any chance of me ever getting out of here.  I don't want to spend the rest of my days here (or in some nursing home), so I made the decision to try to help myself get ahead.

I am walking again.  It isn't easy: at times I still fall and am extremely unsteady at times, but two crutches clamped to my forearms help with my balance.  Even with the crutches, i sometimes fall, especially if I happen to walk on uneven terrain.  I can't tell you how many times I've nearly split my head open (or my nose or face),  but I am determined to walk again under my own power.  At least I am walking again, just not like I used to, with my own two feet.

I don't have feet or legs anymore, just stumps.  One leg was blown off below the knee; the other above.  I am a double amputee of the lower limbs.  

At times the prosthetics press on my stumps, but I have extremely thick socks on to help protect them.  I have to take care of them and check for any signs of sores/pressure marks; if there are any to be found, I have to report to Dr. Chan, ASAP.  We are both working together to try to prevent any future problems/issues.  So far, that's been the case; I pray that continues, in Jesus's name!

I will probably remain here at the rehabilitation center at least several more weeks to a month; then it's home for me.  I will be flying to San Gabriel, Puerto Rico, back to my familia.  They haven't seen me since I was on leave for a week after I'd gone the 12 week required basic training course in the Army.  

My family is excited at the prospect of seeing me again.  Well, the feeling is mutual: I can't wait to see Mami, Papi, Abuelo, Abuela, mis hermanos, y mis hermanas!  It will be a joyous day!  It will also be a day of tears: most of mi familia haven't seen me since I had gotten my legs blown off; it will be a huge shock to them.

But WAIT!! Wait until they see that I am finally walking again!  On crutches, yes, but I will be WALKING!!  I will just have to try to console them and tell them that things will be okay.  I may be shaky and unsteady now, but in time, I will get better in my walking and will get rid of the crutches altogether (hopefully!).

Maybe I can even pick up on playing besbol y futball again!  I have seen movies of amputees doing such things and it gives me hope for the future!  I know El Dio will let me accomplish my dreams because He is that kind of God.  He loves me.

Well, I am tired; PT wore me out.  Think a nap is in order.  Just pray I will continue to do well in my therapy and pray for a joyous reunion with mi familia in nearly a month from now!  I would greatly appreciate it!

~Jesus Cristofer Ventenilla.  

~To be continued.