September 10, 2011~

One of the most defining moments in American history happened when I was a little girl.  I was only eight years old.  I was at school when my teacher told us about the attacks, but it really hit home when I came home and saw members of my family were crying.  I then saw the terrible images that still make me cry  years later.

I can no longer watch the nightly national news because OF September 11, 2001.  I also suffer from anxiety attacks and still have reacurring nightmares.  This is a very hard time for me.  All I can do is pray and hope that it doesn't happen again, especially since we are under threat yet again, even though the mastermind, Osama bin Laden, was killed earlier this year.  There may be more Osama bin Laden types lurking in the shadows ...

I personally didn't lose anybody in the attacks (thank God!), but my mom has friends who did.  One very nearly died as a result of the attacks, but that's a long story.  You have probably heard it not only from mom, but from her friend.  Another one lost her very best friend; that friend worked at the Twin Towers.  She died when the towers collapsed.  So in a way the event affected me on a personal level; no, the event affected EVERYBODY, not only here in America where it happened, but all over the world.

The world as we knew it was changed forever.

That was ten years ago. 

Tomorrow will mark the tenth year anniversary of the attacks.  Once again, survivors will be forced to remember as the news will probably replay videos or news items about the attacks and how it has changed America and/or Americans (or HAS it??).  And since September 11th falls on a Sunday this year, many churches will be holding special services as a way to remember the victims who died in New York City, Washington DC, and that field in Pennsylvania.  Nearly 3,000 men, women, and children perished.

I have seen the images played out on videos or on television and they are imbedded in my mind's eye forever and ever.  I suffer from PTSD and anxiety attacks now; I am on medication to help me deal with the memories/anxiety.  I still write in my grief journal and/or draw pictures ot the attacks as a way of helping me cope, as well as write to some of the victims' families, to let them know that I care and am praying  for them.

Tomorrow I will be singing at a special community-wide service, honoring the memory of the victims.  I will be singing "God Bless America" and an original song I wrote entitled "The Day The Twin Towers Fell".  It won't be easy, but I have to do this.  If I don't, it would be doing the victims and their families a disservice and it would be like slapping them in the face.  I couldn't live with that kind of guilt, so I have to do it.  It's required of me.

I know there will be plenty of tears that will be shed ... and a good number of them will probably be mine.

I will be singing at church as well.  Pastor asked me to and I accepted his offer.

Well, I have to work today; I go in at 9:00 today and work until four.  It is going to be a long day for me.  No, it's going to be a long weekend.  I will write in here again; until later, please take some time to remember what happened 10 years ago and why we must remember.  Say a prayer for America and ask God to have mercy upon her and her people.  May we never see another September 11th, 2001 again in our lifetime!  And may we never forget!!  I know I won't.  I CAN'T!!

~Love, your friend in Louisiana, Ronee' Le-Anne Reaux.  :( +Tears!+