I wish things hadn't come to this ....

I had to put my father in a nursing home.  His Parkinson's got worse; he can no longer care for himself because he shakes so bad and has lost the ability to walk.  Seeing that I have health problems myself (fibromyalgia), I cannot physically take care of him, so after a very long talk with my family (and his wife), we made the hardest decision of our lives.

We put him in last week.  We've done an awful lot of crying ever since; I wonder if the tears will ever stop ...

I just hope that Daddy is not too angry with us, but I don't blame him if he is.  After all, one doesn't get over something like this overnight; it's gonna take a very long time.

I know Mother isn't angry; she knew this day was coming; she was expecting it to happen, and now that it did, she is grateful that she can get some semblance of a normal life back.  She can get out and do things once again, just like she did before her husband's illness worsened in the last six months.

She, in fact, seems rather relieved.  A small favor on my part, but deep down inside, I still feel as if I betrayed my parents.  I know it's not daddy's fault that he got sick, but still ... seeing him getting worse was incredibly painful for all of us.  Now that he is in the care of others, maybe we can relax and pray that he gets the best possible care.  After all, the home where he is at now is one of the better ones and we've heard nothing but good things about Restful Haven.  I pray this is true ; otherwise, heads are gonna roll ....

Just keep us (and Daddy) in your prayers; it's gonna be a difficult time ahead as we deal with the changes that have occurred ....  we (and I) would greatly appreciate it!  Thanks in advance!