Nashville, Tennessee, 7:09 p.m., D.S.T., May 7, 2013~

Dear Journal~

Johnahton here.  I hope this finds y'all well.  As for me, I'm okay, but I'm a bundle of nerves.  I feel as if they are wound up tighter than guitar strings ...

Rebekkah and I are packing everything up; it's funny how much stuff one can accumuate over a lifetime: deciding what stays, what goes out into the trash, or what to give away; it boggles the mind!  I have been doing a lot of crying because this is the only city I've really ever known; I've lived here in Nashville, Tennessee, since I was a baby.  

There are so many memories here.

We are getting ready to move to Norman, Oklahoma; the sooner we go, the better.  I will be attending the University of Oklahoma (BOOMER SOONER!!), to take classes; my ultimate goal is to become a licensed meteorologist and possibly one that's on tv.  I want to show people that just because I have MD, MD doesn't have me.  I am very determined; maybe that's why I've been beating the odds all these years!

Rebekka and I have been at this for the past month; it doesn't really seem like we've made any headway.  That's what's so frustrating about this.  Tim and Jackie, our caregivers, have been an awesome help, taking care of our needs and stuff, but there's still so ... much ... STUFF ... to go through yet!  It's very maddening!!

Becka and I are both doing well, but as I said, we're getting ready to move.  We also have to think about our baby.  We are going to become parents to a boy.  Rebekka is four months along.  So far, everything's been progressing beautifully, but I have to do a lot of the work because Rebekka has to be on bedrest as much as possible.  That is where Tim and Jackie come in.  I feel as if I am taking advantage of them because of my wife's "delicate condition" .... not to mention, Rebekka's disability, which is pain insensitivity disorder, which caused her both legs because of overwhelming infections.  

My own physical needs don't make things easier.  I no longer can walk and need help with just about every personal matter, plus I am ventilator dependent.  I am getting weaker every day, but even with my body, my heart is as strong as an ox.  Mom has always said I had the heart of a lion, and I believe it too, because God must have something in store for me, or I would have died long ago.  (Doctors said I wouldn't live past the age of five; I'll be 21 come December.  That's how I can explain it, the fact why I am still here today.)

Poor Becka has been an emotional wreck.  Any little thing can set off a torrent of tears.  Even if I look at her a certain way can set her off.  It's like walking on eggshells (if we both could walk, that is ... LOL).  So I have to be extremely careful of what I do or say.  It's not easy; it's a wonder I have any hair left on my head because we both have been incredibly stressed out!

Just keep us both in your prayers; we really could use a major touch from God (our minds and our emotions).  Also pray that the finances come in; we have bills that are outstanding (doctor bills, mainly, as well as school costs, which is only going to go even higher once I start school at OU).  I don't know how we are going to make it .... we both would greatly appreciate it!  And in addition to that, pray that Rebekka's (and my health) holds out!!  With a baby on the way, the last thing we need is one of us going out of commission!  Thanks in advance!

I'll try to write soon; sorry it's been so long!  Take care and God bless!

~Love, your friend, Johnathon.  :)