I don't know why my big sister had to die at the hands of her tormentors ... if it were not for my parents (or the cult), she would still be alive, and my life would have been far different.

I am now with a family who is trying to help me escape the "demons" of the past, but it's hard, especially this time of year.  It happened this time of year when I was six (I'm now 17); hard to believe that this much time has passed, but I am still tormented by her screams.

My sister was flogged and beaten; she also had her skin peeled back like a banana.  She died as a result of massive blood loss; she died before the ambulance even got her to the hospital.  My parents and the other members of the cult were arrested and charged with multiple crimes including mental anguish, attempted murder, torture, and child pornography.

This time of year is so difficult for me.  I hear the sounds of screams from television or from music, or see advertisements of scary horror movies or shows, and it takes me back to when my sister was tortured.  I break out in a cold sweat and I shake uncontrollably; it's as if I'm living this nightmare from my childhood all over again.

I don' t know if I will ever get fully past what I witnessed when I belonged to the cult.  I am trying, but it's hard, very hard, at best.  

I will be so glad when this day is overwith and done.  I hate Halloween, and now you know the reason why.  Halloween only reminds me of evil and death because my older sister died horribly, and I was there to witness the entire thing.

~To be continued.~