
What Would Socrates Do?
Dogs and philosophers do the greatest good and get the fewest rewards. –Diogenes
If Socrates had not lived in ancient times, someone somewhere would have had to invent him. He was just too good to have been a part of the times in which he lived. He was too clear of head, too kind of heart, too gentle of spirit. He might survive today. An ambulatory teacher is not a listed profession, nor does it command a salary in today’s cold, hard world. And so he would more likely than not be a vagrant who wanders about in cheap Wal-Mart sandals, wrapped in Goodwill attire, with some sort of support stick to keep him upright in high winds and stormy weather. It is not an image that attracts the Madison Avenue boys in their search for the sexiest man alive. His moral compass would be questioned today, just as it was in his day, of leading to or stemming from, a corrupt source involving boys. Why not? When in doubt, think the worst of some one who is smarter than you, who commands an audience, yet has no visible means of support.
Let's set morality aside for the moment, and examine Socrates’ convictions about the world of politics. It seems appropriate to do so in that we in the U.S. have now entered that inglorious season, and therefore, the one man now credited with being perhaps the wisest man of all time might help us make sense of “what the hell it all means,” to borrow a phrase from one of our more dubious candidates for president.
According to my source Socrates believed that government worked best when ruled by individuals who had the greatest ability, knowledge, and virtue and possessed a complete understanding of themselves. Right away we have a problem. Do we have any such candidates for president? Can we find any? And would they contend if found?
The pessimist would answer “no,” “no,” and “no” to all three questions. But Socrates was not in the business of answering questions, rather, he questioned his listeners until they found the answers within themselves. You’ll have to admit: Avoiding answers is a pretty smart start in almost anything we do.
Socrates would likely ask: “What characteristics would you want in a candidate?” And my guess to the extent that I understand the common man would be “ability, knowledge, virtue, and a complete understanding of him/herself.” And that would be followed by “And where might you find such persons with those characteristics?” After some hesitation and deep discussion, the congregation would likely come up with: “in children, about age 10.” To which Socrates might then respond: “And how would you circumscribe (that means narrow down) this group to just those who are likely to carry out their responsibilities.
After more thought the crowd would announce their answer: “In the Girl Scouts.”
To which Soc would reply: “Why?” And the answer coming back would be thusly:
On my honor, I will try:
To serve God and my country,
To help people at all times,
And to live by the Girl Scout Law.
(While saying this, hold up the 3 middle fingers on your left hand)
Girl Scout Law
I will do my best to be
honest and fair,
friendly and helpful,
considerate and caring,
courageous and strong, and
responsible for what I say and do,
and to
respect myself and others,
respect authority,
use resources wisely,
make the world a better place, and
be a sister to every Girl Scout.
Girl Scout Motto
Be Prepared
Girl Scout Slogan
Do a good turn daily.
And Socrates would reply: “You are doing fine, my children. But how would you elect the best candidate from among them?”
After considerable discussion back would come their answer: “We would place the names of all Girl Scouts into one of two hats. Hat A would contain the names of all those who wanted to be president, and Hat B would contain the names of all those who did not want to be president. Then we would throw away the names of all those in Hat A, and draw a name randomly from Hat B. And that would be our new president.”
Socrates would be beaming with delight. His final remarks: “You have done well, my children. Go in peace, live long, and prosper.”