When things get dark, it is hard to have faith, but when it happens to me, and all the times I think God doesn't hear me...it is hard.
O ye of little faith
Sometimes I have trouble believing or having faith in God. Does anyone do that? I am sure they do. Because we are human. Sometimes I say, “God don’t you even hear me? You stand silent when I need an answer or want to have assurance you are listening to me. I just want to know that you hear me. Are you really who you say you are?”
And when you get like that things are magnified like a mountain. I know you know what I am talking about. That is the time we need to focus on things that are good, not on the problem, not on the “what ifs” or “what should have been”, but we need to be thinking how wonderful God is, and how great the world is and remember the times He led us through the wilderness and the flood and brought us through to the other side where there was light and we were unscathed.
I find myself these days, wishing things were different, and what happened was different, like I wish Eddie never had Alzheimers so he would be with me these days. He would have loved living in Floresville. He would love this simple life. He would have loved going to HEB to shop for groceries, even taking his coupons. I wish Julie had never gotten sick, and had her life changed so drastically, that Lacey would not have died. I wish that all my children had not had so many heartaches and troubles, and I wish that my grandchildren had not had and are still having heartaches and troubles. But that is life. I wish we still were that family that was so close and were so happy, 30 years ago. But I know that is wrong. I want to keep on being positive and grateful for my life and theirs. I want to be thankful for our lives now, and thankful for all for my children and grandchildren, and their spouses and former spouses, whom I loved and still love. I ask God to heal all wounds for all of us.
I think these are the days of darkness for all the world, especially America, whose country people came to seek freedom. And there have been earthquakes, tornadoes, awful snowstorms, etc. where people lost everything and also some lost their lives. And the economic system is worrying many people. These are days of darkness for a lot of people. But I need to focus on good, positive things. Set my thoughts on things above. That is why I don’t watch any negative TV these days. I want things to go in my mind that is good, positive, and joyful. So this week we are only watching good moral shows. Like Hallmark Channel movies.
We need hope, faith, and comfort. So when times are like this, I go to my bible and try to see what God is saying to me, to us. If you have a bible, I hope you go there and close yourself up in a private place and pray and ask God to show you how you can have hope, faith and comfort. Then ask Him to point out to you the words that He wants to show you, and you will have what you ask. I am beginning to feel better this morning by doing just that.
I was looking up things about faith on the Internet, (there are so many good quotes about faith, read them and be glad) and Patrick Overton description of faith is so good.
“When you have come to the edge of all light that you know And are about to drop off into the darkness of the unknown, Faith is knowing one of two things will happen: There will be something solid to stand on or you will be taught to fly” Patrick Overton
And Jeremiah 29 had these words to say which delights me. Especially the last sentence, where God says He will bring me back from captivity…for we are held captive by our negative thoughts!
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the Lord, “and will bring you back from captivity.” Jeremiah 29:11-14
Wow. I have been studying and reading and writing about faith for two hours. I feel so much better. I feel something good is going to happen to change my thoughts to positive things.
Inside the Methadone Clinic. Addiction to heroin, methadone, and other opiates. Destruction. The primal addiction" of the child, power and control over your own life, the institutions and the characters, the love between a mother and son. This book i
