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Eva Pasco

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Books
· Aileen's Guesthouse: A Heartfelt Contemporary

· Etta's Fishing Ground

· Mr. Wizardo

· 100 Wild Mushrooms: Memoirs of the '60s


Short Stories
· Rooted in Time

· Drifting with the Tide

· Off the Bunny Trail

· The Profoundness of Pie

· The Chimes

· It's a Wrap!

· The Quest

· Fifteen Minutes of Charred Humor

· The Filing Cabinet

· The Decision


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· Book Review: Contested Ransom by Jack Kregas

· Book Review: The Haunting of Serpent's Manor by Iwan Ross

· Book Review: Overt by P.S. Winn

· Book Review: Drowning in Deception by Judith White

· Book Review: The Light Step by Kristina Gallo

· Book Review: Calamity by the Carwash by Sharon Mierke

· Book Review: Infernal U by J.S. Frankel

· Book Review: Voices by P.S. Winn

· Book Review: A Simple Man by Sharon Mierke

· Book Review: The Weight of Consequence by K.D. McNiven


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· Book Review: Aileen's Guesthouse by Eva Pasco

· Book Review: 100 Wild Mushrooms: Memoirs of the '60s by Eva Pasco

· Book Review: Mr. Wizardo

· Book Review: Etta's Fishing Ground

· Book Review: Aileen's Guesthouse by Eva Pasco

· Book Review: Aileen's Guesthouse by Eva Pasco

· Book Review: Mr. Wizardo by Eva Pasco

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Deadpan!
By Eva Pasco
Last edited: Saturday, May 19, 2018
This short story is rated "G" by the Author.
       
Recent stories by Eva Pasco
· Homespun Goodness
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· Drifting with the Tide
· Off the Bunny Trail
· The Profoundness of Pie
           >> View all 100
How iron-ic!
“We just keep on lighting the lights and following the formalities.” (Psycho’s Norman Bates)

Since the importance of being earnest prevails in my role as caregiver, it’s purely pot luck that I’ve kept dormant relics from the Iron Age for potsterity—pots & pans and outdated gadgets.

Following the formalities established in the past when I had the time and ambition to dabble in cooking and baking, to my chagrin, I’ve not de-potted with any tools of the trade.

The odds are in favor of my dancing to Dee Dee Sharp’s “Mashed Potato Time” as opposed to putting the squeeze on a handheld potato masher.

I’ve never once fired up my George Foreman grill to inflict a third-degree beef burn.

If I’m not even baking quick-breads in Pyrex, it’s a stretch to believe I’ll reach for the Bundt pan in the rear of the cupboard.

I’ve retained a manual mixer as a reminder of those third-grade teaching days of yore when I demonstrated gear ratios in a science unit on simple machines.

No longer stir-crazy, come high or lo mein, my wok ceased functioning as a hot commodity since the onset of the Recession in 2007.

I can’t recall when I last drained pasta in a colander.

Since cooking is a prerequisite for leftovers, I should discard most of my plastic storage containers rather than enable the clutter.

Iron-ically, I’d de-pot with every iron relic if push came to shove in the unlikely event of moving. Until then, I’ll follow the formalities of deadpanning.
  

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Reviewed by Susanne Leist
Reviewed on June 4, 2018
I chuckled as I read your story since I just threw away a whole set of pots and pans that had seen better days. I still have many old relics, but I'm determined to clean out my cupboards.

Reviewed on May 27, 2018
I love the old pots and pans. I have inherited some from my parents. I still have a cast iron wok which works great!

Nice story, Eva!

Sandie

Reviewed by Linda Gould
Reviewed on May 22, 2018
Rather nostalgic! I enjoyed this.

Reviewed by m j hollingshead
Reviewed on May 20, 2018

enjoyed the read!



NEVER STOP WRITING!

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