Guide to Caregiving Category:  Health/Wellness Publisher: TM Brown Type: Non-Fiction Pages: 64 Copyright: October 10,2006 ISBN-13: 9780979870101 This is the first book of its kind that helps the reader to identify when dying has begun. In doing so, the reader is able to get help and support in caring for their loved on in those final months. "Guide to Caregiving in the Final Months of Life" may be the single most important book you will read about end of life care. This book will answer all your questions: • How will I know when my loved one is no longer able to recover? • When does the medicine for pain start to work? • What can I do that will make them more comfortable? • How can I tell when their medical treatments are no longer working? • How can I talk to them about their wishes for their final weeks? This book will validate the choices you are making and will make you feel better about the care you provide. Excerpt Only 10% of Americans will die suddenly. The rest of us (90 percent) will gradually deteriorate, losing weight and growing weaker and becoming more dependent on others for care, as we age or fall prey to a debilitating illness. Perhaps because this process is so gradual, families and friends don’t recognize the signs and consequently fail to adequately prepare. We don’t have the vital conversations that reveal how and where our loved one wants to spend their final weeks…how they want their possessions disbursed…how they want to be remembered. We don’t have the conversations that allow old misunderstandings to be voiced and forgiven …memories and history to be shared...and true connection to be achieved. I am hopeful that this book will support you on this intimate journey with your loved one. That it will serve as a road map to understanding life’s final chapter. That it will help you hope for the best but prepare for the inevitable. And most importantly, when your loved one dies, I hope that it helps in achieving the deep comfort that comes from knowing that you did your very best in a difficult time. Recognition and acceptance of the slow decline of health over a lengthy time period is difficult. In fact, many people who are declining still view themselves as managing just fine. When my mother-in-law was leaving the nursing home to come back to her home, she had declined so much that we were discussing the need for in-home caregivers. She could barely walk, yet she could not understand that she needed help and resisted hiring someone. She insisted, “I am just not that sick.” She died less than 48 hours later. Somehow, she just could not acknowledge her decline either to herself or her family. Family members also may want to deny how seriously ill their loved one is. It’s only when we think back over several months that we can see the subtle signs of decline. Denial can be a way of protecting ourselves from the painful reality that we may soon lose our parent or loved one. But this same denial that is so helpful to us in being able to cope also interferes with making the necessary plans to living life’s final weeks as we want them to be. In addition to denial on the part of both the patient and their loved ones, our culture does not recognize that death is the natural end to life. In our society’s popular entertainment outlets, death is often viewed as the enemy. The enemy that should be fought until the fight is won or lost. No one considers that the fight itself may intensify or prolong suffering.Death is rarely portrayed as a welcomed relief for someone who has been ill and suffering for a long time.

About.com/palliative care
Guide Review - Guide to Caregiving in the Final Months of Life
Betsy Murphy has worked as a hospice nurse for over 23 years and shares her wealth of experience in this great little booklet. She begins by helping readers identify when dying actually begins -- which is usually much sooner than we think -- and goes on to explain why recovery isn't always an option. These two factors are critical to the acceptance of death and are, too often, overlooked.
Murphy then walks readers through the process of dying, offering practical tips to caregivers along the way. She covers some of the most common symptoms a dying person will experience followed by advice for their caregivers to make them as comfortable as possible.

This booklet would be a great addition to the library of hospice nurses and social workers as they help prepare their patients' loved ones for the task of caregiving.



Nancy Manahan Ph.D, author of the award-winning book
This book is one of the best, clearest, most concise, and most compassionate end-of-life books I have ever read.