The Parents' Handbook provides you and your family with the knowledge and tools to make a significant difference in your lives and your family's well-being.
“Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible – the kind of atmosphere that is found in a nurturing family.”
VIRGINIA SATIR, FAMILY THERAPIST
The Parents' Handbook provides you and your family with the knowledge and tools to make a significant difference in your lives and your family's well-being.
By the time you finish the Parents' Handbook, you will have discovered how to:
Have meaningful, supportive conversations with your partner and children.
Address beliefs or habits that get in the way of being an effective parent.
Help your children address beliefs or habits that limit them.
Support yourself and family members in achieving your respective dreams.
Fulfill the six primary parenting roles essential for the well-being of your children.
Support your children in learning effectively at school and at home.
Although written for parents, the material is presented at a level older teens can understand and use. With the aid of their parents, younger teens will also find most concepts in this book useful.
Neuro-linguistic programming has helped hundreds of thousands discover their own potential and live the lives they desire. Make it the difference that makes a difference for your family.
Excerpt
Different Parenting Roles for Different Needs
Your children need your presence more than your presents.
—Jesse Jackson
Parenting is the process of helping your children to 1) become aware of their potential, 2) expand their wings beyond their family and 3) perform and evolve at the peak of their abilities in a safe, supportive environment. It involves drawing out their strengths and helping them to bypass personal barriers and limits in order to achieve their personal best.
Each child is a unique individual, and each has their own schedule for growing up. At each stage of their growth, their needs and expectations from their parents will change. To meet these needs, parents take on different roles and communicate with each child according to that child’s focus, style and age requirements. As a parent, you play six primary roles – sometimes two or three at the same time; at other times, one specific role may dominate. These roles, which require a different mindset, tools and techniques and approaches, range from providing your children with the necessities of life (environment) to making them aware of their potential (purpose in life) in a larger context than their current experience with their family or circle of friends.
Caretaker and guide
In these combined roles, your focus is on your children’s environment (where, when and with whom). As a caretaker, you promote your children’s development by providing safe and supportive play, learning or work environments free from unnecessary outside distractions. As a guide, you’re familiar with the territory (at minimum, more familiar than your children) and provide guidance and direction on possible paths they can take to achieve their desired outcomes.
Coach
Traditional coaching, which is referred to here, is focused on what your children are doing – their behaviors. As a coach, you help your children perform to the best of their abilities by identifying and encouraging specific action steps they can take to reach a successful conclusion.
Teacher
For the most part, teachers provide information and instruction on how to do a task or achieve an outcome. As a teacher, you help your children develop new strategies, skills and capabilities for thinking and taking action, rather than focusing on a particular accomplishment in a specific situation. With your assistance, they discover and refine many of their unconscious competencies, making these a way of life.
Mentor
In the mentor role, you provide guidance and influence to generate and strengthen important beliefs and values for your children, and you function as an appropriate role model.
Sponsor
Being a sponsor, you recognize, acknowledge and promote an attribute or identity that is already within your children, but that is not yet fully apparent or that they are not yet aware of. You do not have to be a role model; you may not have the same skills as the attribute being sponsored.
Awakener
As an awakener, you bring to your children’s attention something larger than themselves (family, community, spirituality) and the purpose/vision that is awaiting them.
Each of the above roles includes follow-up on your children’s progress by providing respectful and timely feedback. This feedback includes praise and suggestions for improvement to help them learn and grow. For example, as a coach you provide feedback with regard to the actions your children have or have not taken, while a mentor will model and provide direction on specific beliefs or values that are important.
These competencies of caretaking/guiding, coaching, teaching, mentoring, sponsoring and awakening are essential skills for supporting your children. Each of the different levels of support requires a different interaction between you and your children, as well as a different tool set and abilities. Many situations will require a combination of these competencies.
These six roles have a hierarchy. The skills and abilities related to a particular role must include and also transcend the skills of all of the previous levels. That is, a teacher must have and exhibit the skills and abilities of a coach, a caretaker/guide and more. On the other hand, a guide may not possess or need to exhibit the skills and abilities of a coach.
You May Be Single, But You’re Not Alone.
Being a great dad is challenging enough when you’re part of a two-person team. But now you’re raising your kids single-handedly. How can you provide the emotional, physical, and spiritual support your
When Kathy finds a small stray kitten some amazing things happen. Story's from a Mom's view of the love, caring and patience needed when a child wants to own a pet. Recipient of the prestigious Mom's Choice Award. Delightful illustrations!
When Kathy finds a small stray kitten some amazing things happen. Story's from a Mom's view of the love, caring and patience needed when a child wants to own a pet. Recipient of the prestigious Mom's Choice Award. Delightful illustrations!
