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diane wilkie

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Surviving Domestic violence (A simple guide to breaking free)
by diane wilkie   
Books by diane wilkie
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http://survivingdomesticviolence.simplesite.com

Category:  Relationships
Publisher: Open Scroll Publications

Type: Non-Fiction

Pages: 203

Copyright: 
1st of November 2019

Surviving Domestic Violence. (A simple guide to breaking free) is a newly launched book by Diane Wilkie. It is a practical down to earth guide detailing what domestic violence is, how to recognise it and how to successfully break free and get your life back!

Surviving domestic violence invites everyone to understand that no-one has to remain a victim but can instead choose to be a survivor! Often domestic violence is perceived as an unfortunate, inevitable life situation that cannot be changed or escaped from! You can however fight back and receive the most rewarding prizes that you deserve; the gifts of safety, choice and freedom within your relationships. This is a practical, down to earth guide, detailing what domestic violence is, how to recognise it, as well as the strategies to follow to be able to successfully break free, get your life back, become happy and liberated, and ready to make up for lost time! Freedom is worth fighting for, and the rest of your life starts now!

You will learn how to:

(1) Identify what is domestic violence

(2) Learn how to practically break free)

(3) Learn what is a healthy relationship

(4) Understand the different agencies that provide help and support

(5) Become equipped to survive, conquer and get your life back


Excerpt

WHAT IS DOMESTIC VIOLENCE?

Domestic violence takes place whenever a person uses abusive and manipulative behavior, to control another person. Often this occurs within a relationship type scenario, where a person literally abuses their power over the other person. Essentially it amounts to the victim being bullied by the person being aggressive towards them. This behavior, can and often is accompanied by violence, (even the threat of it is enough, to stop the victim in their tracks)! The aim is to intimidate the victim and force them to comply, doing whatever the abuser decides has got to happen! The victim is left feeling as if they must give up even their basic human right, of having the power to choose!
Many times, domestic violence is suffered by women at the hands of men. It is however important to establish, that it obviously is not always the case. Sometimes, it is in fact the other way around. We do however have to face the fact, that a lot of the time, violence against women is indeed the unfortunate reality.

Often it is a complete mystery ... WHY ON EARTH DO WOMEN STAY IN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIPS? Why don’t they just get up and leave? On the surface these are simple enough questions. However the answers are much more complicated.

Often, they stay with an abusive partner generally, due to incorrect thinking. They become trapped by the false notion, that the domestic violence they suffer from is somehow their fault. They come to believe that if they had not done or said certain things, they would not have provoked him! They have often been told they deserve to be abused anyway. Before long, lies and reality become entwined to such an extent, that soon it is impossible for them to make a clear distinction between the two.

Mistakenly they often believe their love is strong enough to change their partner. It is as if they have temporarily forgotten, that this same person continues to choose to be aggressive towards them. Things get hazy and they don’t always manage to see that this is wrong and will never be right under any circumstances!

Sometimes it is as simple as them thinking they won’t be believed, if they told anybody. At other times they are so gripped by fear, that their abuser will harm and even kill them if they tell anyone. It is so easy for them to come to believe that, they are the only one in the world that this could possibly be happening to!

Although the victim often spends majority of their time crippled by fear in the relationship, for them in many ways the ‘fear’ of the unknown is so much worse. The violence has become so normal to them, that they cannot even comprehend leaving the situation. They are just too afraid to take the necessary steps to change things, because of all the uncertainty that change would inevitably bring.

A good example of this is when they have become financially dependent. When they have no money of their own, and have always depended financially on the abuser, it is not so easy for the victim to separate themselves from the relationship and go somewhere else. Sometimes it is the sheer fear of the expense of starting all over, that forces them to stay put. They would have to get a new home, and basically start a whole new life! It is perhaps not easy to even comprehend, the possibility of having their own money, or the knowledge of managing their own money, especially when they have never had to do it before. The truth is, it is not easy to leave! If it was, victims would just get up and leave every single day.



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