Even the best leaders—in fact, most of the best leaders—start out as decidedly bad ones. And sooner or later they reach a moment of reckoning that leadership expert Bill Treasurer calls the leadership kick in the ass.
“This is one of the most unique and valuable books you will read all year, and I highly recommend it.”
—Jim Kouzes, coauthor of the bestselling and award-winning The Leadership Challenge and Dean's Executive Fellow of Leadership, Leavey School of Business, Santa Clara University
Even the best leaders—in fact, most of the best leaders—start out as decidedly bad ones. And sooner or later they reach a moment of reckoning that leadership expert Bill Treasurer calls the leadership kick in the ass. When it happens, it feels like it's all over. But Treasurer says that with the right attitude, that kick can be a new beginning. Based on his work with thousands of leaders, this book reveals how to turn those ego-bruising events into the kind of transformative experiences that mark the paths of great leaders. As Steve Jobs famously said, “Getting fired was the best thing that ever happened to me.” This book is a survival guide, coach, and morale booster to help you use that kick to move forward instead of fall down. If you succeed, the next place you get kicked might be upstairs.
Excerpt
My interest in writing this book goes back twenty-five years when I learned that I sucked at leading. I was a traveling gypsy, hurling myself off 100-foot towers into small pools at amusement parks throughout North America. I had just become the captain of the U.S. High Diving Team and was responsible for leading a troupe of young, high-flying athletes and ensuring that they consistently performed in tip-top shape. It was my first leadership role, and I was a damn good leader, I assumed, because the team was performing decently, and, well, the fact that I had been selected as the team's captain was proof enough.
Each day, my teammates and I would put on a thrilling aerial exhibition for our amusement park patrons. We'd start by performing Olympic-style dives from the 3-meter springboard. Next, we performed a comedy routine where an audience member (another diver planted in the audience) challenged one of our teammates to a diving competition. After that, we'd entertain the crowd with clown dives-called dillies-like the "Baby Catch" where one diver does a front somersault into the arms of another diver who simultaneously does a back somersault before they crash into the water together. The show culminated with a diver scaling a 100-foot high diving ladder and hurling himself toward the water, traveling at speeds in excess of 50 mph before hitting a small pool that was ten feet deep.
We were young and cocky, and I was the cockiest among them. I wore my Speedo proudly.
One day, after what I thought was a lousy performance, as the park guests were exiting the aqua-theater I lit into the team. "That show was a total disaster," I barked. "Good God, you call that diving? You looked like flying polka dancers. If this is the kind of team I'm saddled with,
I have serious concerns about the park extending our contract."
There was something else that had irked me. One of the divers had left his sunglasses on the stage prior to the show. The captains who had taught me would have never had stood for that. "One more thing. Who's the idiot who left his stupid shades on the stage for everyone to see?"
Silence.
"Listen up, the next show better be the best one we've ever done, or I'm going to start pruning the team. I'm not going to let you embarrass me like that."
There, I thought, that'll teach 'em. A swift kick in the ass will do this team some good.
As the team shuffled away, one of my divers, Steve Willard, stayed behind. Steve was older than me, and seemed less fazed during my previous outbursts with the team. Once the team was out of earshot Steve said, "Let me tell you something, Treasurer: if you keep talking down to us, I'll walk. I don't need this job so badly that I'm willing to let you treat me and everyone else like crap."
I became defensive. Who was he to talk to me like that, I thought? If I let him dominate me, people will see me as weak. "Hey, I'm your boss, not the other way around. I'll treat you and the team like you deserve to be treated. If you want me to stop yelling, earn it by performing the way I expect you to."
Steve shook his head like I was missing something. "Listen, dude. You've got bigger problems than the sunglasses I forgot on the stage. If you keep making people afraid of you, nobody is going to want to work for you. You suck at leading."
Gandhi once said, "The truth only hurts if it should." Steve's harsh comments stung because, down deep, I knew they were true. I wasn't being a leader; I was being a jerk. I sucked at leading. The truth was, I didn't know what I was doing. I had no idea who I was as a leader. The best I could do was mimic the leadership style of the captains I had watched, other bosses before them, and ultimately my dad. My own approach to leadership was mostly based on the heavy-handed, high-strung, and disciplinarian style of my father. I wasn't me. I was me being him. Respect me, dammit, or else!
Leadership change often requires a startling blow, and Steve's words were the jolt I needed and deserved. I was utterly humiliated. After licking my wounds of embarrassment, I set out to become a better leader. I started reading books on leadership, observing leaders I admired, trying different leadership approaches, and paying close attention to the needs and reactions of my divers. Respect, I learned, can't be forced or commanded. It has to be earned and re-earned through every encounter with those whom you're leading. The more I itched my interest in leadership, and the more focused I became on earning the team's respect, the better I got at leading. Eventually, I decided to go to graduate school and did my thesis on the relationship between leadership style and effectiveness.
Professional Reviews
Jim Kouzes, coauthor of the bestselling and award-winning The Leadership Challenge and Dean's Executive Fellow of Leadership, Leavey School of Business, Santa Clara University
Bill Treasurer's book starts with an immovable truth: sooner or later, everyone fails at leading, especially when new at it. When it happens, Treasurer calls it a leadership kick in the ass. But fear not, by mastering the skill of confident humility you can move from rejected to respected.“This is one of the most unique and valuable books you will read all year, and I highly recommend it.”
—Jim Kouzes, coauthor of the bestselling and award-winning The Leadership Challenge and Dean's Executive Fellow of Leadership, Leavey School of Business, Santa Clara University
Even the best leaders—in fact, most of the best leaders—start out as decidedly bad ones. And sooner or later they reach a moment of reckoning that leadership expert Bill Treasurer calls the leadership kick in the ass. When it happens, it feels like it's all over. But Treasurer says that with the right attitude, that kick can be a new beginning. Based on his work with thousands of leaders, this book reveals how to turn those ego-bruising events into the kind of transformative experiences that mark the paths of great leaders. As Steve Jobs famously said, “Getting fired was the best thing that ever happened to me.” This book is a survival guide, coach, and morale booster to help you use that kick to move forward instead of fall down. If you succeed, the next place you get kicked might be upstairs.
Ken Blanchard, coauthor of The New One Minute Manager® and Collaboration Begins with You
“This book's title may have grabbed your attention, but its core topic—the human ego—is dear to my heart. Using candor and humor in equal measure, Bill Treasurer gets real about the leadership advantages of what I'll just call effective redirection. Ha! This book is not just a fun read—it's a wake-up call for leaders at every level.”
Marshall Goldsmith, Thinkers50 #1 Leadership Thinker in the World
“Failure may not be fun, but as Treasurer has proven in his rich, in-the-trenches experience in business, you can learn more from one failure than from untold wins. A Leadership Kick in the Ass is exactly what you need to pick yourself up, find out what went wrong, and move on, smarter and stronger than ever!”
I can see why you had a need to write this book. I think it would apply to some of the so-called leaders that I've known in recent years since the role of leadership has changed from benign stewardship to money focused ego trips. That's why I fear for our country because one of the largest money focused egos out there is now at the helm of the United States. I hope he will learn your lesson quickly like Arnold Schwarzenegger did or we may be making some big mistakes in regard to other countries and even in regard to our own people.
Born the dominant twin, I was a natural leader and took responsibility for my actions by the time I was 10. I never led by exclusion (keeping only the best around me) but by inclusion. I often had the poorest performers on my team but I worked to bring out their best performance they were capable of. Although I found myself superior in many things there was always someone else around that was better and that kept me humble. I can't recall ever having a big ego, although some may have thought I did. I certainly was a very good follower, sometimes by challenging the leader of our group at the time and making them perform even better as a result.
Like you, I love high diving. But an underwater swimming accident when I was a junior in high school (a classmate jumped on my neck) fracturing a vertebrae (I wasn't told by the doctor who x-rayed me) and damaging some discs led to spinal surgery C4-6 when I was a junior in college at 20, 54 years ago. An anesthesia overdose on the operating table caused the surgery to fail and I was left with upper body paralysis, mostly my hands and arms with atrophy and losing my triceps. When I dove after that, I had to put my arms at my sides or my hands would slap me in the face when I hit the water with my hands out in front. My legs were still quite strong, so swimming, especially underwater, was not a problem.
But the perception of my ability had changed and leadership opportunities became quite rare even though I excelled in graduate school (except in engineering MS at Stanford where I ran into too much theoretical mathematics). Still, I had many mentors who were very good leaders in those days and opportunities opened up for me as a result. In the latter years as my condition deteriorated and I had to go into an electric wheelchair 25 years ago, the weak leaders who became my superiors who seem to operate under reading Machiavelli rather than authors like you started to make my life miserable. Now I'm retired, writing and managing my three employees who take care of me very well. I'm still a softy when it comes to management, but I think it is best not to beat people up for inadequacies that they inherited but try to make them the best they can be.
Because of my honesty and ability to do numbers, I was made Treasurer in several organizations. But regardless of your position, you will always be a Treasurer… Groan… I know you've heard it before… ;-)
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