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Dolla S Merrillees

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The Woodcutter's Wife: A Stepmother's Tale
by Dolla S Merrillees   

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Booktopia
Bookworm

Category:  Family
Publisher: Halstead Press

Pages: 158

Copyright: 
November 2007
ISBN-13: 9781920831462


The Woodcutter’s Wife is honest, beautifully acerbic, witty, hair-raising and heart-warming. It’s the warts’n’all story of a woman who doesn’t have all the answers. Dolla Merrillees’ journey of becoming wife, stepparent and then mother is one that will resonate with families across the globe who experience the changing dynamics of modern families. And with anyone for whom love has been so much more complex than any fairytale ever suggested!

HERE IS A REAL FIND. A story about 21st-century parenting in a "blended" family that is bracingly honest, funny and well-written. The best thing about this book is that it doesn't simply refute the bad press stepmothers have traditionally received. Dolla Merrillees is all too aware of her "inner" wicked stepmother as she recounts her struggle to bond with her partner's son, cope with the boy's off-stage, drug-addicted mother and adjust to the emotional tug-of-war that occurs when her own child is born. Merrillees was in her early 30s, footloose and child phobic when she met Ben. She had no desire to become instant mother to a four-year-old boy. Loving Ben, she quickly discovered, didn't automatically mean loving his son. That came only with hard work. The step-parenting guide books Merrillees read were of limited use. What she wanted - and has subsequently written - was a "warts-and-all stepmother tale". Many readers, I suspect, will be deeply grateful.
--------------------
 


Excerpt

“That’s not my Mummy—that’s Dolla! She sleeps with my Daddy. My Mummy lives in Adelaide.”


Professional Reviews

The Woodcutter's Wife: A Stepmother's Tale NON-FICTION
Fiona Capp
The Woodcutter's Wife: A Stepmother's Tale Dolla S. Merrillees Halstead Press, $28.95 HERE IS A REAL FIND. A story about 21st-century parenting in a "blended"
family that is bracingly honest, funny and well-written. The best thing about this book is that it doesn't simply refute the bad press stepmothers have traditionally received. Dolla Merrillees is all too aware of her "inner" wicked stepmother as she recounts her struggle to bond with her partner's son, cope with the boy's off-stage, drug-addicted mother and adjust to the emotional tug-of-war that occurs when her own child is born. Merrillees was in her early 30s, footloose and child phobic when she met Ben. She had no desire to become instant mother to a four-year-old boy. Loving Ben, she quickly discovered, didn't automatically mean loving his son. That came only with hard work.
The step-parenting guide books Merrillees read were of limited use. What she wanted - and has subsequently written - was a "warts-and-all stepmother tale". Many readers, I suspect, will be deeply grateful.

The Age, Melbourne, Australia
8 Nov 2007


Stepfamily Association of Victoria
In a new book, The Woodcutter’s Wife – A Stepmother’s Tale, Dolla S. Merrillees shares her complex, painful journey from a carefree single woman to wife, stepmother and mother. In clear language, and interspersed with references to classic literature, family studies and modern psychology, Merrillees paints an honest picture of modern stepfamily life, and traces her personal journey to acceptance of her unique situation. Unlike most traditional nuclear families where the boy-meets-girl story ends in marriage/partnering and children, with only a few variations, every stepfamily has a vastly different story to tell. Whether the new family unit is formed through divorce, death or abandonment; whether the children are young or in their teens; whether or not care for children is shared; whether relationships with exes are friendly or antagonistic; whether more children are added to the mix; whether extended family accepts the new family members or not; each stepfamily has its own unique past, present and future, its own complications and its own unique set of challenges. Merrillees shares her stepfamily story in a confessional style which is engaging and disarmingly honest.The Woodcutter’s Wife - A Stepmother’s TaleDolla S. Merrillees Published by Halstead RRP $28.95Merrillees was living in inner-city Sydney as a single, successful art consultant when she met Ben. Their courtship saw Merrillees fall hopelessly in love. Five months into their relationship Ben’s four-year-old son Jonathan came to live with them on a full-time basis after Jonathan’s mother, a heroin addict, became unable to care for him. Merrillees discusses in detail the shock of the change from couple to family, and the steep learning curve she faced, from having no experience with children to becoming Jonathan’s full-time mother-figure and carer. Not afraid to tell of the exasperation and despair that accompanies the merging of disparate people into a new family unit, Merrillees candidly shares her mixed feelings for her stepson, her loathing of his mother, and her despair that anything would ever work out for them. But with an intelligent self-awareness Merrillees balances this honesty with wry humour and an insight that has no doubt helped her navigate through the years of establishing a family. The Woodcutter’s Wife is well-researched and well-written. Readers will relate and respond to Merrillees’ experiences, her honesty and her emotional journey. Highly recommended reading.Reviewed by Bridget Tehan Book Review



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