Love Thy Self is a non-fictional self-help book dedicated to the empowerment of women.
Many readers, who happen to pick up this book, may ask why I would choose to write this with an already large array of other self help materials collecting dust on the bookshelves. Well, with my perusal of the bookstores and libraries, I have found very few books written to address the self esteem of women, specifically women of color, and the great need for these women to celebrate self love and self preservation.
The mission of this book is to allow African-American, Latin American, and other women of color the opportunity to embrace their individuality above societal norms, cultural expectations, gender roles, or any other forms of classism. Though we all fit into specific groups according to race, culture, and class, we women all collectively have something special, which makes us uniquely beautiful.
One may also ask why I would target women of color as opposed to speaking to all women. One good reason to mention is the fact that I am an African American woman who has enjoyed the journey of self discovery; its twist and turns, ups and downs, and all of its ins and outs. Despite all the obvious obstacles I have had as an African American woman, I have learned to love who I am and achieve success with great pride. Secondly, I write to hopefully encourage and empower women of color to love themselves from the depths of their souls to the surface of their mahogany, honey-brown, or caramel skin. As beautiful as we are, collectively, we have some serious issues with self esteem and confidence. Thirdly, I pray that this book will help women of color raise their little girls to love who they are, denying themselves for no one.
Excerpt
Chapter 1
Accepting One Self “There is no greater love than the love you discover from deep within your soul.”- Kharisma Accepting one self: What does that really mean? Does it mean to deny others for the greater purpose of individuality? Does it mean separating yourself from the groups for which you belong? Does it mean selfishly focus on your needs, ignoring the needs of others? Well I guess my answer would be…yes and no. Self acceptance is a balance of loving yourself and giving yourself to others. You see, without self acceptance, you can not be of any service to others. The old adage is true: “To love others, you must first learn to love yourself.” Most importantly, how can you find the beauty in others, when you can not find beauty in yourself? In a perfect world, the first person you would fall in love with would be you, then family and friends, and finally your significant other. However, in the real world you know the order is quite different. Usually, as a little girl, you fall for your dad first, (if he’s there,) then the rest of your family, friends, your significant other, and then if you have time left in your life from loving everyone else, you finally learn to love yourself. How crazy is that? I mean really. How often do you hear of people, (maybe even people like you,) who love their husband or boyfriend more than they love themselves? Accepting all kinds of abuse, emotional neglect, and mistreatment, all the while hoping for some sort of love in return. Ultimately, it is never returned. How can a person love you when you don’t love yourself enough to reject abuse and mistreatment?
Love Thy Self Kharisma
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