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sheila collins

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Category:  Humor
Publisher: Apex Publishing Ltd.

ISBN-10:  190779297X

Type: Fiction

Pages: 167

Copyright: 
July 1, 2011
ISBN-13: 9781907792977


Truffles, the celebrity fat tabby cat, goes cruising and gives her views on the kind of holiday millions of us enjoy!

Truffles embarks on a totally new adventure on the ocean waves, finding her sea paws as she sets sail on a luxury (as befits a superior and sophisticated feline) ship with cruise aficionado Sheila, her long term carer and provider of every possible need. New sights, sounds, smells, tastes and experiences face Truffles at every turn from the tiresome car journey and undignified customs procedures to the mystifying and sometimes frightening onboard facilities and activities. Allowed to leave her stateroom to peruse all the non-eating areas - on a lead with matching collar, and wearing a purrfectly preened catsuit - Truffles revels in being the centre of attention, maintaining an outward air of decorum at all times, even when her nine lives are tested to the core.

Excerpt

On we walked past another water pool with lots of coloured water jets spouting over it, and then found ourselves alongside a long room with big glass windows (glass, glass and ever more glass on this ship!) Sheila stopped and peered through the windows. As they reached right down to the ground I was able to peek through them, too. I could see lots of people walking on the spot on some kind of moving roads but they weren't getting anywhere. Strange! There were others sitting on two-wheeled contraptions, with their paws sitting on small blocks that were going round and round, making the big wheels turn very fast but, again, they weren't moving from the spot. Even stranger! The people seemed to be putting a great deal of effort into it all, as they were sweating buckets (a charming little saying of yours, I believe) but it all appeared to be for nothing as they were going nowhere. What a strange pastime, I thought. We cats climb trees, chase mice and jump up and over fences to get our exercise, so at least we do move about; I would get very frustrated if I was just jumping up and down and not getting anywhere. As I've remarked before, cats and humans have such very different priorities! Sheila lingered for a few moments, appreciatively watching some young male humans who were raising and lowering their rather hefty arms and holding things that looked like giant egg timers in their paws, which seemed to be very heavy.
Then we set off again, and finally, yes finally, we reached the end of the decking road and the front of the ship. Although the sun was still very bright and hot it was very windy here. I felt that if I had not been anchored to the lead I might have flown away! Still, that would have been an uplifting (excuse the pun!) experience for a cat. How wonderful it would be, I thought, to fly like a bird - and how much easier it would be to catch one! One can dream, I suppose.....


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