Hiking in Glacier National Park up to Iceberg Lake; I was behind you, our boots crunching on the gravel in perfect sync; lulled into a trance-like state where all there was, was a beat, the crunching of our feet, rhythmic breathing and the thumping of our hearts. I followed, but in my dreams, I was in the lead.
I stopped to rest and was finally able take in the beauty of the scene: the wonder of majestic mountain peaks penetrating the fathomless expanse of sky, mist draped around them like voile. I saw the mountain goats grazing on the slopes - hundreds of them, with curled horns and glassy eyes. They paused their grazing to look at me with mild curiosity and then, seemingly bored, went right back to grazing. Nearby, fast-moving water slid over rocks, wearing them smooth as glass. In the valley, a translucent turquoise lake glistened, catching the light in myriad mirrored sparkles. The beauty so profound it caught my breath and when I remembered to breathe again, I inhaled the redolence of ozone-rich air and the unmistakable scent of damp wood, mingled with myriad other scents, and momentarily closed my eyes. With tender, reverent fingers, I traced the rough edges of a Douglas Fir's trunk and thought, "I want to stay here but since I cannot, I’ll take it in and it will stay with me...forever"
I have often 'imprinted' beautiful moments like this into my soul in this way. I can take those experiences in and they stay with me always. Some memories still make me smile and some still break my heart, but they are all threads in the complex and colorful fabric of my life.
Witkoppen adventures, riding bareback like two wild kids and screaming into the wind. Rafting, crab catching and treasure hunting - our jewels were broken shards of glass. School days, gazing out the window and dreaming I could fly. That first kiss with that boy under the bridge in Riverclub when he told me he loved someone whose name began with a C. My heart beat fast. Could it be me? Turns out it was and we kissed gently and for what seemed like an eternity but we never kissed again. I remember the day someone dared me to run outside naked in the freezing cold and stupidly, I did, my skin turned bright pink and stung like hell when I slipped into a hot bath. I waited out the pain and it was worth it. I remember the scent of lavender, the steam that rose and the way those warm fluffy towels felt on my skin. Sitting atop Dassies rock, with my brother Rupert, where we could see right to the horizon: that place we shared our dreams of a future that would never be. I can still see his distant-gazing eyes upon the cold steel table at the morgue. The pain that scalded my heart and buckled my knees.
Thoughts float back and forth like gauzy curtains at a window as the breeze spills in.
I remember staring intrigued at a dragonfly suspended above the swimming pool on a hot Sunday afternoon. The scent of freshly mowed grass, those mouth-watering smells of barbecue, sounds of children's laughter punctuated with shrieks and splashes, men joking in baritone like bear growls and women laughing like birds...
These, and so much more.
The times passed but their indelible imprints remain.
What memories we will create in the years to come? A veritable cornucopia. I feel it in my heart and in my soul. As I remember the past, the good and the bad, I’m so ready to embrace the future and many more imprints to be made, some that will pass but many will remain.
