Donalde is busy preparing to take the gold-lidded throne. Every fool needs fools to be wise, and to that end he has busied himself this week while at the toilet, with appointing fools to fill his Court of Fools, writing each name down on his branded roll.
As is widely known, Donalde himself is a graduate of the Cretan School of Fooles. Its totem animal is the phallic-faced proboscis monkey, a species whose females have much smaller noses than the males to whom they are attracted because big noses make louder noises.
Adherents to the Cretan School of Fooles wear a broad red tie that dangles between and well below the knees. Grande Fooles also wear orange-haired toupees at gatherings celebrating their Sacred Odor.
Donalde is not without critics to dispose of, so many that it is impossible to get rid of them all, therefore he has created the Devil’s Advocate Office, staffed by fifty certified fools called Groundlings because they are already known for their groveling.
Donalde has appointed Je Suis Moi to head the DAO. The fools will draft their criticisms of Donalde’s proclamations and submit them to Je Suis Moi, who will select one of them for personal delivery to Donalde on Cheeseburger Fridays.
Je Suis Moi shall be the only certified fool licensed to openly criticize Donalde’s behavior with impunity on Cheeseburger Fridays. Otherwise, the critic shall be deported to the gulag in Puerto Rico and be beheaded for being unfaithful, a legal process Donalde grew fond of when he watched a documentary on Tamerlane during his recent visit to Siberia. The debates on the questions raised will be covered by Foxy News. Stay tuned.
