I thought I'd share some of the lyrics to Control by Poe(copyright goes to her!) ... Cuz I am taking control!!
Don't you mess with a little girl's dream
'Cause she's liable to grow up mean
Surprised you to find that I'm laughing?
You thought that you'd find me in tears
You thought I'd be crawling the walls
Like a tiny mosquito and trembling in fear
Well you may be king for the moment
But I am a queen understand
And I've got your pawns and your bishops
And castles
All inside the palm of my hand
While you were looking the other way
While you had your eyes closed
While you were licking your lips
'Cause I was miserable
While you were selling your soul
While you were tearing a hole in me
I was taking control
Now I have taken control
Now I have taken control...
This is beginning to feel good
Watching you squirm in your shoes
A small bead of sweat on your brow
And a growl in your belly your scared to let through
You thought you could keep me from loving
You thought you could feed on my soul
But while you were busy destroying my life
What was half in me has become whole
While you were looking the other way
While you had your eyes closed
While you were licking your lips
'Cause I was miserable
While you were selling your soul
While you were tearing a hole in me
I was taking control
Now I have taken control
Now I have taken control...
So this is how it feels
To breath in the summer air
The feel the sand between my toes
And love inside my ear
All those things that you taught me to fear
I've got them in my garden now
And your not welcome here
Come a little bit closer
Let me look at you
I gave you the benefit
Of the doubt it's true
But keep in mind my darling
Not every saint is a fool
While you were looking the other way
While you had your eyes closed
While you were licking your lips
'Cause I was miserable
While you were selling your soul
While you were tearing a hole in me
I was taking control
Now I have taken control
Now I have taken control...
Don't you mess with me
She sat there, still a child within her heart. Strewn about her were her dreams, shattered like a million shards of a mirror. The man she had thought to be Prince Charming had left her broken with her dreams. All she knew were the voices in her mind, and the cold shadows and the darkness which surrounded her for so long at this point in time. Her feet had so many cuts by now, from walking around on so many broken dreams. There were cuts on her hands as well, from where she had tried so
many times to piece everything back together from time to time. Her nails were broken too, from scratching at the walls, windows and doors; which were all either boarded up or had brick and mortar blocking her path.
Oh, he would encourage her to pick up the pieces of her childhood dreams. Yet, whenever she did, he’d condemn her with either laughter or contempt. Usually, it was anger and contempt. He would leave her sitting there locked within her mind with the voices to keep her company. Some were nice, they would keep her company; the friends she never had in real life. But most were memories of those that berated her, tormented her in reality. They were the ones always there shouting at her, calling her names and making sure that she never rose above the waters, making sure that she kept drowning in shame and self hate. She believed those voices, and the terrible things they said. Every day, she woke feeling worthless.
Her favourite method was the razor, always was. The way flesh sounds as the blade slides across it, the tension felt and the sensations. Can’t forget how the blood pools to the surface either. Much like crimson watercolour paint upon wet paper as it blossoms to the surface. Sometimes, it was just to ease the pain … but others, they were her failed attempts to bring an end to the strife she’d felt all her life. The last time, she felt the blade right next to the artery but something held her back. She was even a failure at taking her own life! How pathetic is that! There were overdoses too, but medications never did her much good … high tolerance to any kind of drug.
When she was happy, he was angry with her. When she was sad, he was angry with her. She felt chained up, locked inside. That is, until one day she found writing again. The words have never stopped flowing since and now the sun shines, the grey is slowly fading into blue skies and the darkness is something of a gift to be looked back upon. Each day she carefully picks up a dream, armed with crazy glue, as she slowly starts to piece back together what was once destroyed.
She still weeps, but not uncontrollably; that she fights with every ounce of strength of her will. Poe’s Control runs through her mind continuously now as she begins to take control of her life so that her children can have a better life.
The true story of Cheryl Pierson Cuccio who made headlines in 1986 and her husband Rob Cuccio. Cheryl was abused sexually and physically and Rob died for 43 minutes on Cheryl's 43rd birthday.
This is not a drill. The attack on Pearl. They were the ghost planes of the night, deadly, illusive, sharp-clawed Black Cats. The Memoirs of ARM H.P. Lawrence, a Pearl Harbor survivor, Black Cat, and decorated war veteran.
Asa D Seeley, a young Afro American man, shares his struggle to leave his past behind as he reaches for his future. In his one-of-a-kind style, he searches for answers...from the visible & invisible. A Memoir in Poetical/Prose form.
