There's much we can do to make this holiday season more enjoyable

 

 

 

 


Making the Holiday Season More Enjoyable by Aubrey Hammack (Published in the Macon Telegraph December 23, 1995)

This time of year brings us our most celebrated holiday, Christmas. Most families have traditionally placed a tremendous amount of emphasis on this Christian celebration. With so much attention given to this season, there is no wonder that the added strains and pressures cause some problems.We want this season to be special so much that we romanticize it and have unrealistic expectations. When our "perfect Christmas" is not realized, we have a tremendous letdown feeling.

 An additional reason for the stress is the pace we set for ourselves as we over-extend both physically and emotionally.

Also, during this time, we have less daylight, which research in the last few years has suggested contributes to depression. So with all of these obstacles coming together, no wonder that we feel more strained.

In addition to these problems, if we have recently experienced the death of a family member or close friend, or some other loss, this complicates things even more. Our skies continue to be cloudy because of having to get in touch with these kind of losses. The first Christmas we spend after the death of a loved one is especially hard, as we learn to make adjustments.

We have the tendency to idealize this season. We distort reality. We remember Christmases that never were. We expect this holiday to be perfect like on the Waltons or Ozzie and Harriet.Some of us live with a sour depressing remembrances of the past.

 We might have had scars from holidays past and, unfortunately, feel it is our appointed duty to relive them each year at this time. Of course, this will always steal the true meaning of Christmas from us.

There are some actions we can take to help with the above problems.First, we need to give ourselves the gift of "Christmas Present". That is, we must decide that we are going to live in the present and take this holiday and make it a good one. It doesn't matter that we've had bad ones before. This is a brand new opportunity for us to have a good one.

One of the factors that hinder us from doing this is telling ourselves that we can't help the way we are. We tell ourselves that since it has always been this way, it is too late to change.

Below are some hints that can make this Christmas much more enjoyable:

1) Implement a budget. Remember we will have to repay any bills that we make. We should be realistic as to how much money can be spent.

2) We should get the proper amount of rest and exercise. Our schedules are going to be more hectic and we will tire easy. The exercise will make us feel better.

3) Remember that, just because it is Christmas, everyone will not necessarily get along at all the parties and family gatherings. If you have hard feelings with someone for 11 months out of the year, don't be so silly as to think that there might not be problems now.

4) Give lots of support for those who have lost loved ones at this time of year. They need to be handled with special love and understanding.

5) Ask yourself what is it that is being celebrated, anyway. If it is a Christian holiday, then put some emphasis on that.

6) Watch the children, and let them teach us what love is all about. They ahve that child like faith that can make us all feel good.

7) Put less accent on the dollar side of this holiday and more emphasis on the true meaning, which is loving people.

8) For those who ahve drinking problems, be aware that you are more at risk. If you are already getting treatment for this, get a sponsor to help.

9) People with eating disorders are more at risk. If you haven't already, contact your therapist or get a sponsor to help with this.

10) For those of us who know people that are alone, make contact with them and encourage them to spend some of this time with someone.

11) To get some of the focus off of ourselves, volunteer to help a family that is in need.

12) For those who feel they are so overwhelmed and depressed with the holidays, please contact a therapist.