Dear Y'all...I love you, and want you all to have a wonderful holiday season. At this time in my life with wonderful things happening I believe that I actually witnessed (Tues. Dec. 4) the beginning process of the transitioning of my 94 year old grandmother Ruby May, as she begins her journey into what I call "heaven". It is very difficult for me to let go but I know this, she did come out of a very deep dream like state to smile at me, and ask me the cutest question "What, why you leavin' you just got here!"

Then seconds later, she was gone again. In a way maybe the angels were giving her an open house mansion tour at lunchtime. But she was very aware of everything going on. Just couldn't respond. She was like a rag doll and her legs were cold.

I'd been there for over and hour trying to feed her, she was absolutely comatose and her insulin was normal, her B/P was 118/54 (the 54 was low)her pulse was 70 and her respiration was fine. She was not under the influence of any prescription drug to cause drowsiness.

Personally witnessed, she scared everybody on staff at the nursing home. My grandmother is very active even at 94 with alzheimers, she's very sharp, she notices everything. She tries to say my name and when she did it was in a hypnotic type way....she'd whispered "cynth" ...  "cynth". . . .

I don't believe in talking to spirits from the other side once they've gone on because the bible says there is a great gulf between the living and the dead. However I definitely believe I witnessed the beginning of her homegoing. When God chooses to bring her home to Him is His decision of course. I'm just very glad that she is healthy and well as can be. And it's quite difficult to write this but I know she's leaving so I can carry one. She won't leave until she knows I'm strong enough to receive the article and testimony that I know God is preparing me for in my heart to bless others who may be going thru the same thing.

What hurts me more than anything else is that I am a person all about education, not about personal gain. Whatever I gain, I want to have others be able to enjoy the fruits of whatever my struggles have been so that others will not have to struggle. This is why I urge you to read my personal post under ARTICLES of what I feel is a very selfish motive by someone who posted their personal travel speel under an article I wrote called "YTB TRUE CONFESSIONS"

There are things in the travel industry rumor mill that will always pan out with time. The more we are blessed with our business, the more I'll be able to write and travel to various locations to meet other authors, create cashflow for other offers by purchasing their books, even maybe someday have  youth scholarship for young authors which has been a dream of mine, as well as to self publish. I don't believe I was born to be anything BUT an author. And I believe that whereever God has place me is good enough if I continue to strive for places that God only wants me to be part of.

I did not find Authors Den on purpose. I did not find YTB on purpose. But what I did find on purpose was a wonderful sincere group of people like you who reach out to me when times are difficult emotionally. What the author who calls himself/herself "major rsd" posted at "YTB True Confessions" was something that I find to be a most unprofessional thing. I don't want anyone to feel as if I am using this forum to promote my business. What you do is what you do, not everyone was meant for YTB.

But what I know and see is this: YTB is letting me finally live my author/speaking/publishing dreams. Whe people are blessed by others, nothing but good comes about.

Just had to say this, more than likely prompted by the fact that I saw my grandmother Ruby begin to drift away....that's tough...hope you understand if I'm not around for a while.

love you, hugs to you, and many blessin's
cynth'ya