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Carol Kluz

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The Whine Syndrome
by Carol Kluz   
     
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Frivolous lawsuits, diminished parental rights, and the coddling of criminals have all played a role in society's whine syndrome.

Blame is the name of the game anymore. People are no longer expected to take responsibility for their own actions. I call it the 'whine syndrome' because it reminds me of little kids who do something wrong and blame their playmate. 'He made me do it.'

The recent payoff of a smoker of three billion is ludicrous. By his age, he was born after the Surgeon General's warning was first announced. Warnings are on packs of cigarettes and cans of chewing tobacco. This is supposed to be a free country. If someone chooses to smoke, isn’t that their right? If he’s willing to gamble with his health, that is also his right. Tobacco companies are legitimate businesses that pay tons into the coffers of the country and states through taxes. Something is way out of kilter here.

Should Idaho farmers be sued because some kid choked on a potato chip? Oops, forgot about the chip manufacturers. How about the teen whose acne erupted after eating a chocolate bar. Should the candy manufacturer have to pay for his treatment? If an inexperienced hunter accidentally shoots himself in the foot, is the gun manufacturer to blame? Is it the government because it happened on public lands? What if the hunter's wife gets bitten by a bear. Who will she sue…the state for allowing bears on public land or the shoe manufacturer because she couldn't run fast enough?

Heck, my screen door has a good spring and it slammed shut on my cat's tail severing several inches. Maybe I should have sued the spring manufacturer for the stress it caused me and my cat. Then there was the time a small icicle fell off my roof at the exact time I was walking under it. Aha! The builder must be responsible for making the roof slanted so that icicles would form on a frigid January day and zero in on my head.

Then there are the criminals being analyzed, probed and excused…after all, nobody is capable of doing anything wrong unless they were driven or coerced by parents, peers, or society. Will this era go down in history as the age of the perpetual whine…the age when responsibility, along with discipline, disappeared from civilized society? Haven’t we learned anything when we see our children committing violent crimes that were once extremely rare? Isn’t it time to admit that spoiling and encouraging a constant feel-good attitude doesn’t work? If we never experience disappointment, how will we know when something is truly special. If we never know sacrifice, how will we learn to appreciate the fruits of that sacrifice. If, as children, we’re never punished for deliberate and willful acts, how will we learn to cope with the rules of society later on?

I recently watched an Oprah show in which a mother was chagrinned because her young son, around five or six, spent his entire day parked in front of the television. She didn’t know what to do. I reached for the remote and shut off the TV. Aloud, I said: ‘Shut off the TV.” I just couldn't bear to watch another show with parents being controlled by their children. There’s been a dumbing-down of parenting ever since Dr. Spock came on the scene. Two generations later have proven his theory on raising children is a dismal failure. It’s time to stop analyzing and excusing. It’s time to bring back discipline (not abuse) and give back parental rights to parents. It’s time to quit coddling criminals and paying millions in frivolous lawsuits.



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Reviewed by AMY
Reviewed on May 31, 2002
I AGREE I COULDNT SAID IT ANY BETTER , SNICE IM CURRENTLY GOING THROUGH FAMILIE SERVICES BECAUSE MY EX WANTS TO BE AN ASS AND CAUSE SO MUCH PAIN TO MY LIFE AND MAKE UP LIE AN ACCUSE ME OF THINKS IM NOT DOING JUST FOR THE SPORT IT SEEMS LIKE , I DONT UNDERSTAND PEOPLE THEY LIE JUST TO RUIN OTHERS LIFE BUT THEY SCHOULD LOOK AT IT AS IF THEY WEE IN THE SAME SHOES , HOW WOULD THEY FEEL , HOW WOULD THEY COPE WITH THAT THEY SURE WOULD THINK TWICE BEFORE THEY ACT IF THEY KNEW HOW IT FELT AND THE PAIN IT CAUSES MY MOTTO IS TRAT OTHERS ON HOW YOU WANT TO BE TREATED.

Reviewed by Claywoman (Reader)
Reviewed on May 28, 2002
A wonderfully written article and it says so much! Thank you for writing it! I disagree with one of your reviewers however, as a smoker, I take full responsibility for smoking; no one put a gun to my head and told me to smoke the first one nor all those that followed. I smoke because I want to smoke! I agree, the frivolous lawsuits surrounding tobacco are rediculous, especially for those who are suing after the Surgeon General's warning came on scene. I taught my children they are responsible for their own actions, I may have given birth to them, I may have guided them, but they are thinking, responsible people, capable of making their own choices rightly or wrongly. I remember getting a copy of the Baby book and it is the only book I threw into the garbage!

Reviewed by Michael McGowan (Reader)
Reviewed on May 28, 2002
I enjoyed the passion with which you argue your case and I think everyone needs to study all the points of view.

However, I found one big inconsistency. You argue that Americans need more of a sense of responsibility, however, in regards to cigarettes you seem to completely absolve cigarette companies of any responsibility for what they sell and how they sell it. The "Surgeon General Defense" just doesn't cut it- consider this: in order to get new "customers," cigarette companies scope out kids while in their formative years in middle-school (and even elementary school!) when their grasp of the facts is low but the peer-pressure is high. Now, you say that someone who is now sixty and suffering from lung cancer should have known better. But what if that person was hooked when he was twelve, an age recognized by law for not being ready to tackle major personal decisions. If the law says a 12-year-old is not responsible enough to vote, how can you turn around and say they are responsible enough to know and appreciate the consequences of taking up smoking. And the cigarette companies are anything but blameless. Other than peddling to kids, they tamper with the formula of their product in ways to make it just a little more addictive and make it harder for current customers to quit. The idea that tobacco companies are acceptable because they pay taxes is ludicrous- tobacco is an addictive drug not unlike alcohol or cocaine or heroin.

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