The changing picture of the institution of marriage
The meaning of marriage has changed in contemporary times. Earlier it meant a kind of pledging together to belong to each other and it entailed doing for each other. This involved a sense of responsibility and dutifulness. Now it has come to mean fewer responsibilities and more rights. The question one asks oneself is what one is gaining and what one is losing in marriage; it is more of a deal that one strikes in life and therefore marriage now involves more conflict and aggression. For this reason marriage is now becoming an avoidable institution. In the most advanced societies fewer people consider it worthwhile to get married in comparison to what happened till a century ago. J. S. Mill and, then some feminist and other thinkers, have suggested that marriage can weaken one or both partners instead of strengthening them.
It's good to see you posting again. It is my understanding that most marriages in India, until recently, were arranged. However, two of my friends from India met and fell in love with their spouses in college. One has had a long married life and the other divorced after both got their masters degree. Each had the same, very high IQ with ambition that led to different lifestyles.
I agree with Eva about the points being debatable. In my mother's case, she became pregnant at 17 and was forced to marry my father as a result. Raising me and my twin brother, she was unable to go to college. My father became a truck driver, a Teamster union member, and well-paid. My mother had to work to help pay for expenses for a growing family and always held low-paying menial jobs like cleaning lady, factory worker, and waitress even though she is very intelligent, writes well, is very well organized, and kept the family together despite of many years of fighting and financial problems largely caused by my father's foolhardy schemes and spending. When they retired in 1982, my mother's entire lifetime earnings were only equal my father's earnings that year. She worked just as hard, if not harder, the entire time. They stayed married until he died and were married 62 years.
In today's environment they would have been divorced in their 20s. My younger brothers have each been divorced twice and now married to a 3rd woman. Marriage does indeed, weaken both partners, because it creates codependency.
While the meaning of marriage may have changed in modern times, each of your valid points are debatable--one of them being that marriage is an avoided institution. One of the many positive changes I see is that as women became more educated, they were no longer dependent on their husbands, so did not have to knuckle under.
Democratic Dilemmas and Divine Inspiration examines the significance or relevance of the idea that the U.S. Constitution was, as many believe, divinely inspired. How much did that belief matter to founders of the nation and how much does it matter no
I agree with Eva about the points being debatable. In my mother's case, she became pregnant at 17 and was forced to marry my father as a result. Raising me and my twin brother, she was unable to go to college. My father became a truck driver, a Teamster union member, and well-paid. My mother had to work to help pay for expenses for a growing family and always held low-paying menial jobs like cleaning lady, factory worker, and waitress even though she is very intelligent, writes well, is very well organized, and kept the family together despite of many years of fighting and financial problems largely caused by my father's foolhardy schemes and spending. When they retired in 1982, my mother's entire lifetime earnings were only equal my father's earnings that year. She worked just as hard, if not harder, the entire time. They stayed married until he died and were married 62 years.
In today's environment they would have been divorced in their 20s. My younger brothers have each been divorced twice and now married to a 3rd woman. Marriage does indeed, weaken both partners, because it creates codependency.
Ron