|
Here's an excerpt from my collection of poetry. Enjoy.
As a teenager I was but a child lost in a world not of my own making but struggling to learn the rules and to obey the rules I felt had been placed upon me. Those rules made by others, real or imaginary it mattered not for I found deep within myself the strength, the will, and the desire to be me. Thus, I shook the cold embers within myself to redeem and try to be the soul I am. I learned, "The one inside, so cold and un-woken is ME. She was an individual that needed to emerge from her cocoon to love and to be loved". The essence of me was just to be…one who makes me happy and accepting of that person, knowing that the past can not define me nor could it be changed, but the future was still a book to be written. It was the now and the tomorrows to come that I could and would influence and change. It was only up to me to shape my life and to discover the delights that exist in this existence.
The roads of the world ahead may be filled with bumps and twists as well as pains and sorrows. I may become bruised and shattered, but I can not become defeated unless I stop trying, stop believing in myself nor who I am. No one else has the right to define me, or label me unless I allow them too. As I have grown I could feel my strength and determination to be me and only grow stronger. It was only now that the time had come to let the world know who I really am.
Within this collection of old poetic droppings and new inspirations I hope to instill a picture of a struggling young woman trying to cope with her inner emotions of not only the growing pains within herself from child to teenager, from struggling with parental rules…as she tried to understand those she lived with and the world around her…the wars of the world as well as the wars from within her, then from teenage inner torments to the ever changing struggles of being an adult.
Here are groups of thoughts that have span over three and a half decades that may reach others to let them know that they are not alone in thought or emotional distraught, that another had been through those murky waters. To not give up, but to emerge from those murky waters and realize that no one is ever alone…there is a hand waiting to hold theirs through the foliaged lands known as Our World.
Because the internal pressures inside would not settle I first discovered the ability to write when I was about thirteen years old. I had been at times a shy kid, a child without a voice, playing the part of a good girl, of trying to be prefect, and to be what those around me wanted me to be, or what I thought they wanted me to be. For during the day, I appeared like any other little girl, maybe quieter then most, but still a child. It had been only in the seclusion of my room, my private world away from others that I learned to weave the words of my pain. Only after the shattered glass of what I thought what was my real world fell on to my bedroom floor like a fish bowel splattering not only glass and water but the flapping fish. It was then that I began to pick up the shard pieces of life and painfully put them back together. Now I had the pieces to help me understand what had been while I was asleep in the fog.
Life isn’t easy for some; it is not only a simple candle that someday burns out but an exciting journey of discovery. It is not a discovery of life it’s self but a discovery of yourself as well. In the rear view mirror of life just read, enjoy and hopefully one will benefit from this work.
***************
©HCD 2006
|
B&R
Very sage, Helen, and a powerful reminder that we all truly need now and then, especially in this chaotic modern world of ours today.