"Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret."--Ambrose Bierce

Speaking when we are angry is one of the quickest, and surest, ways of getting ourselves into trouble. We all get angry at times, and we often say things, even when we are not angry, that we will later regret. But when we combine anger with careless speaking, we are playing with fire that is almost certain to burn us. 

Anger can be either a positive or a negative force in life.  Anger can motivate us to stand up and be counted in the ongoing battle against injustice. Anger against our own shortcomings or an illness can give us the strength necessary to cope with our problems.

But blind, uncontrolled rage is without virtue, and it can be extremely dangerous. Wise men and women have been speaking out against the evils of uncontrolled anger throughout history.  In the year, 1537, Pietro Aretino wrote, "Angry men are blind and foolish, for reason at such a time takes flight and, in her absence, wrath plunders all the riches of the intellect, while the judgment remains the prisoner of its own pride."  More than 400 years later, in 1953, James Baldwin wrote, "Rage can only with difficulty, and never entirely, be brought under the domination of the intelligence and is therefore not susceptible to any arguments whatever."

We cannot prevent ourselves from becoming angry at times, but we do have some control over our behavior, even when we are angry.  Sean O'Casey wrote, "It's my rule never to lose my temper until it would be detrimental to keep it." Since it is rarely detrimental to keep our temper, this is a rule that most of us would do well to follow.  Unfortunately, some people have great difficulty controlling their temper.  According to Frank Moore Colby, "Many people lose their tempers merely from seeing you keep yours."

If we cannot learn to totally control our temper, we can at least work toward controlling our behavior during periods of anger.  We can make it a rule to keep our mouths shut as much as possible when we are angry.  We may think hateful words during periods of anger, but it is almost always wise to wait until we have cooled off before speaking those words.  Often we discover that we no longer want to use the hateful words after we have calmed down. 

Perhaps we all need an internal siren that goes off when we are angry and warns us to be very careful about both our actions and words during such times. According to an old American Indian saying, "Anger is as a stone cast into a wasp's nest."  How many of us would be so foolish as to throw a stone into a wasp's nest?  Shouldn't we be just as cautious about our behavior and our words during periods of anger?

TB-31—Posted 05/17/2014