Ten ways to free yourself of the 'Neo-Liberal' ideology endemic to modern publishing, (or Ten ways to destroy the 'brand' status of your literary output:):

1) Produce deliberately imperfect 'literary product' - i.e. defective product. Make your story, poem, play etc. perfect except for one major 'defect' that will render it unsaleable.

2) Deliberately publish photos of yourself that highlight wrinkles, acne, bad teeth, etc. Make yourself ugly, or otherwise unacceptable as a possible 'brand' name author. If you are older deliberately 'show your age'. Plastic surgery and all other forms of 'product upgrades' etc. are absolutely out!! And remember - don't smile or try to look 'bohemian cool', instead cultivate what we Australians refer to as: 'daggyness': i.e. look like you're trying a bit too hard to be seen as a 'writer'. If you look attractive AND 'authorial' under all circumstances, try photographing yourself with your pet cat or dog.

3) Criticise the work of obvious 'big name' egomaniacs associated with the circus that is post-modern culture. Describe them as human 'products' that you have no interest in and no desire to meet, etc. Be completely indifferent to, critical of or sarcastic about the obnoxious 19th Century Social Darwinist ideology behind the Star System (highlight the inflated incomes and general inauthenticity) in your writing and public comments. Any intelligent agent or publicity wing of a publishing house will worry about the 'legal repercussions' etc. associated with taking you on. REFUSE TO PLAY THE ARTISTIC GENIUS/TALENT GAME BY: 1) Telling everyone that you will refuse all awards that come your way - quote: 'I'm not some pampered literary pooch competing in the literary equivalent of a dog-show' (PS: No offense to dog people intended here - just to humans who like to see writers compete for money, prizes, etc. instead of paying them a living wage). 2) Refuse to provide 'long-winded achievement-heavy' bios for recital prior to public appearances or for the back flap of your books. Make your authorial bios short and sweet, or - better still - non-existent.

4) Cultivate a liking for 'silence' and 'boredom' - also try to be 'uncreative', 'unimaginative' and 'non-unique'. Deliberately attempt to 'bore' your readers for significant stretches of your work - forcing them to stop reading early and thus move on to a product worthy of their appetites for genuinely 'hyper-capitalistic' literature.

5) Be over-elaborate and too keen, in your attempts to pitch, sell, promote/market and move your books. Splatter 'SALE NOW ON!' 'GET IT WHILE (L)IT LASTS!' 'CUT PRICE POETRY HERE!' 'BUY TEN, GET ONE FREE STORY!', 'FREE SOCKS OR UNDERPANTS WITH EVERY PURCHASE OF THIS NOVEL!' 'EARN PETROL POINTS WHEN YOU BUY THIS ESSAY!' etc. across the back cover of your book to remind readers that in truth most literature these days is sold by multi-national publishing houses that see no difference between literature AND toothpaste.

6) Refuse to provide any biographical details that might open you up to 'analysis' (by Neo-Freudians or Dr Phil with his re-processed CBT techniques). If you've done anything interesting, or experienced anything extraordinary in your life - especially if you've had breakdowns, break-ups or smash-ups - scrupulously conceal these things from the media, the public, etc. BEFORE you get famous. Refuse to make a 'spectacle' (reality TV show) of your private life. In short, give the feature writers, biographers and literary muck-rakers NOTHING interesting to write about and work hard to remain 'uninteresting' throughout your career.  Modern publishing is mostly interested in screaming 'EXTROVERTS' that look good and sound 'inspirational' at festivals, so try to come across as a dull INTROVERT. And remember to let your writing alone to do the talking - a sure-fire recipe for 'de-branding' by the modern mass media! 

7) If you write longer narratives - novels, screenplays, creative nonfiction books or plays - completely IGNORE the 'Vogler Arc' at the same time as you ignore systematically the recommendations in McKee's book Story. No Hollywood film deals for you since the archetypal bedrock of story-telling will be absent from your work! While you're at it confess to being completely bored and indifferent to Hollywood and the L.A. lifestyle. If you're writing poetry keep doing this. Poetry all but DEBRANDS itself these days unless you can convert it into popular song lyrics or verses for Birthday and Christmas cards.

8) Be scrupulously political and critical of a range of oppressors (there are many these days to choose from). Be tediously, continuously and acrimoniously POLITICAL in every encounter you have with the media. Quote whole passages from Christopher Hedges' book Death of the Liberal Class, or from New Internationalist magazine to interviewers, radio announcers, TV people, biographers, etc. Also, scrupulously avoid 'single issues' - the favoured approach of brand enhancement merchants advising big-name artists - AND instead critique entire SYSTEMS of OPPRESSION by talking about 'hyper-objects' like 'the class system', 'gun culture', 'global warming', 'international extreme capitalism', 'neo-colonialism', etc.. In particular, be 'unpatriotic' toward any oppressive foreign policies enacted by your nation on 'other' nations by your military and corporate elites. This is VERY effective at getting you 'de-branded' - as Hedges' book (see above) documents!

[NB: if you have trouble being 'political', try to be genuinely 'intellectual' instead - i.e. recite long segments out of Habermas' Theory of Communicative Action (Vol 2), and in German ... or out of Derrida, Horkheimer, or Kant - Kant is still good to quote even 200 years on - at your interviewers. Dare to call yourself a 'public intellectual' (guaranteed to get you hated as well as de-branded!). Depth is out these days - image, simplicity and surface is everything - so de-brand yourself by being deliberately and genuinely 'deep' and 'complex' in your thinking.]

9) Plan a harmless literary hoax (preferably exhibiting a sense of humour) involving multiple Authorial identities/heteronyms/pseudonyms for yourself such that your identity is split between too many literary 'brands' to provide 'brand cut through' for publishers. Google the 'Ern Mallee Affair' for 'STARTUP' guidelines. The authors of that particular Australian literary scandal gave their copyright away ... which leads us to:

10) Relinquish various levels of copyright ownership over your work ... but in a way that doesn't allow anyone else (read 'oligarchic multinational publisher' or 'New Media content aggregator') to profit from your work ... otherwise it kinda defeats the purpose! Look up 'Creative Commons' for details of how to do this.

PRODUCT WARNING: the ten steps discussed above do not guarantee that you will become 'De-branded' - if you are an unknown they may even lead to you becoming 'well-known' as a kind of 'grumpy misanthrope' authorial brand (a bit like the French author Michel Houellebecq). If you are already well-known they may lead to you becoming an unwilling 'spectacle' (following the rules of Guy Debord's theory and Jean Baudrillard's various 'stages of the simulacra'). If this happens to you - please accept my apologies and rectify the situation immediately by hammering away mercilessly at point 8 above.