How rare is it to have someone in this world who truly makes me happy.

I crave his voice.  It always places a smile on my face.  I could hear the smile in his voice through the telephone.  We seem to have that effect on each other.

I tried to lay down and sleep but I was too restless.  My mind kept drifting back over our friendship.  How we automatically clicked from the first night we rode the subway together through now.  Our friendship has actually lasted longer than his marriage.  There is something connecting us that I don't think either of us can put our finger on.


Perhaps the reason I didn't give into him the night we spent together was because the timing was all wrong.  We haven't talked about that night, nor of our feelings about what happened since then.  I guess neither of us wants to open up that can of worms.


Five years...the fall of 2000 was when I met him.  I never figured when I met him that five years later I would still be laughing with him and making him smile. Out of everyone, he is the only one who still makes me feel good inside.  How rare is it to have someone in this world who truly makes me happy.  For five years we have been this way.  I'm not really sure what happened over the past few months when we started to drift apart.  The rift was not deep enough to pull us away from that...feeling.


I feel him so deeply sometimes that it hurts.  He is entwined into my spirit and I love the way it feels when he is near and as it carries through the cadence of his voice.  Maybe I love him...or...maybe I am just enchanted with him.  Who knows?  Who knows what this feeling is?