I'm so tired of being sick and tired, I've decided to finally do the righteous thing: I'm officially breaking up with my self. I've had it. Here is my letter of resignation from a long and torturesome entanglement:
To: Tova Gabrielle (ie formerly "me"-ie a dysfunctional self)
From: Tova Gabrielle (the real "me")
Attention: Dwindling Support System
cc: Bored of Relations
Dear Ms. Gabrielle:
I am writing to let you know my intentions regarding
our long and torturous relationship: The time has
come to inform you that this is no longer working for
me and I want out. I have given this a great deal of
thought and have come to the conclusion that the whole
arrangement was a poor idea, one based upon need and
co-dependence, rather than one which could possibly be
a solace and support within and towards the world at
large. I believe that it is time to separate so that
we might both have a chance to move on with our lives
and I realize this will be difficult for you to do,
that you do not know who you are without using my
name, that you are completely dependent upon me, that
I am, litterally your higher self, your only hope,
your light in the darkness. But I just can not
support your selfishness and neediness any longer.
I too, regret that I have become so identified with
your physical and emotional needs that I am uncertain
how to even begin a life free of imagined emergencies
and overwhelming demands. I find you exhausting and I
am incensed at your attitude of entitlement that has
excused your encroachment upon my valuable work and
contemplative time. I must ask that you do not
attempt contact with me, as it will interfere with
making a clean break and I refuse to be held hostage
any longer to your incessant attention getting ploys .
I do admit that you were fun and stimulating and even
that I will miss our moments of intimacy but I believe
that I will eventually find more satisfying relations
with one with whom I am not so intwined through common
karma and memories. I believe our relationship has
become incestuous and immoral and ask only that you
return to me the things with which I first entered
this relationship: my body and my mind.
This is great! I have been looking for something to read that would make me laugh out loud and thanks to "A Dear John Letter (to myself)" I've gotten that. This is so creative and imaginative and hilarious. Thanks so much for the great laugh! I think we all feel like this from time to time. Just once I'd like to switch with someone just for awhile; you know....keep it interesting.
... this is not only highly creative and well organized, it if hilarious. as a poet with very little sense of humor, i find you have shed new light on the concept of human bondage. [and i had always thought it was only for the sub/dom set :]
Reviewed by Dan Vel (Reader)
Reviewed on October 13, 2002
Well said. I wish I had the courage to do what you did as somedays I can't stand myself, always hanging around 24/7 at every place I go, it's as if I have no privacy from me! But then, I look back, and like that "Foot prints in the sand" poster, I see how "me" was always there in my worst moments...dragging from my leg...and I feel like kicking "me" out for good! Great letter, very original!
Reviewed by C. Gourlay (Reader)
Reviewed on October 10, 2002
an a w e s o m e piece of work ....and sadly one to which I can relate, having taken my own self hostage and threatening not to release my self until my demands were met, amongst other torturous things, upon numerous occasions. Thankfully I surrendered several times to my self and now keep my self on a very tight leash -thus far I have endured, however I remain aware that this condition is subject to change with notice and I am therefore not in the habit of holding my breath.
A humorous look at the world and life through my eyes.
Follow the author and his wife, as they travel the world …. several times over.
Laugh at their funny stories, self-inflicted crazy events, strange observations, wacky zoo facts and snippets
Deputy Dave Jenkins sets out to find the murderer of the local high school principal, aided by a voice from the grave that is sometimes helpful and sometimes misleading.
"Murder isn't usually this funny."
Amazon reviewer
was undeliverable
behind the bars
of my Vodka-focked soul
had i read this
i would've missed out
on Prozac and god
lol