By Monica Cane

Recently I found myself in the middle of the most unique God-lesson regarding, of all things, our year end W2 tax forms.

Now I've received plenty of W2 forms from employers over the years and while I admit that I've always enjoyed ripping open the over-sized envelope each January to see the total wages I earned the previous year, I never particularly spiritualized the W2 moment.

It wasn't until my new job as a bookkeeper required that I tally up the earnings and deductions of 30 employees and create W2's for each of them that I suddenly felt the need to become "spiritual" about IRS forms.

Having no prior bookkeeping experience but willing to give it a try, I took on the task with high hopes. However, as I attempted to understand the difference between W2's, W3's, 1099's and 1096 forms along with totaling year-end salaries, deducting state, federal, social security and Medicare taxes, finding the correct employment identification numbers and learning which box meant what on the small rectangle IRS form, frustration kicked in.

Perhaps if I had started the learning process six months prior, it wouldn't have been so challenging but I dove into the income tax abyss 23 days prior to the deadline, required by the IRS, for distributing W2's to employees. With each passing day I became more aggravated, more confused, less joyous and dare I say, less friendly.

While for some number-minded people creating W2's are no big deal but to me, a word-minded person, it was a very big deal. It seemed as if every time I thought I knew what I was doing, I would discover that I had no clue. And the worst part about it was that all the employees were counting on me to provide them with their perfectly accurate, completed forms.

Every morning before heading to work, I would ask God to help me understand the numbers and all the details required and while some days I felt my prayers reached the throne of God, most days I felt as if my prayers must have hit the ceiling and never made it through.

Finally, one afternoon the numbers, figures, calculations and my personal lack of knowledge got to me. I threw my work aside in anger and even though I've experienced the power of prayer, I didn't want to talk to God about it. I opted for a bad attitude and a mound of stubbornness.

By the time I left work, I was determined not to talk to God about the W2 nonsense and just figure it out myself. Instead of going straight home, I went shopping and then treated myself to a fat-free Espresso ice-cream which I must confess, was a delectable way to avoid talking to God. A few hours later I went home, still not uttering a single prayer to God about my frustration though my mind was whirling with numbers. Then ironically, I did the very thing I encourage others not to do. I vented my frustrations to family and friends while totally ignoring God. When I hit the sheets that night, I said a few quick prayers but still refused to discuss my fears, irritation and need for help with God.


Well thank goodness for Gods personal involvement in our lives and His mercy that covers our stubbornness. While I was busy shopping and eating ice cream and refusing to talk to Him, God was on the job.

The next morning I woke up and the first thing I read before heading to work was a text message on my phone from my husband. He said, "The word of the day is found in Mark 4:39 "Peace be still." He also added, "Sometimes our mind is so active, we forget to let the Holy Spirit guide us." Wow! If that didn't turn the light on in my brain, I don't know what could have.

Even though I had prayed prior to my afternoon and evening of rebellion, I wasn't really letting the Holy Spirit guide me. Like with most things unfortunately, I was attempting to carry the responsibility and burden alone by trying to figure everything out on my own. I wasn't allowing God's Holy Spirit to fill me with His peace while I learned what I needed to learn slowly but surely at work. I was trying so hard and ever time I hit a wall of frustration, I became more determined to figure things out myself until I stopped talking to God all together and eventually headed for the ice-cream fix.

Isn't it interesting that when we are in a sticky situation, we do everything but what we encourage others to do. How many times had I told others to draw strength and guidance from God? How many times had I reminded others of the verse "peace be still?" Yet here I was ignoring my own advice.

As soon as I read my husbands reminder, "peace be still" everything changed. I confessed my attitude, my frustration and my lack of understanding. And wouldn't you know, when I got to work that morning everything that didn't make sense the days and weeks prior, made perfect sense to me. By allowing God's peace to fill my mind and spirit, I completed the W2's on time, satisfied the employees and more importantly was reminded, that while fat-free Espresso ice-cream does satisfy frustration for the moment, it's only the work of God's Holy Spirit that really brings us the help and peace we need.