The Connection Between Cartoons and Drug Use

Sometimes when I go to my sister's house I find myself wasting significant hours watching cable TV in particularly the cartoon network. I like it because it shows many of the "goldie oldies" I used to watch when I was a kid. However, a little while ago I started noticing how many of the cartoon characters would act like many of my friends when they were fucked up on a certain drug. Then I really started watching them and realized how many of them did act they were on drugs. This probably explains partially why this cuntry has supposedly a drug use "problem." Look at where every kid gets his first role model at!

Here's the lowdown on what I believe each of my favorite characters are on. Well, let's see that badass Tazmainian Devil is obiviously a crackhead with the way he's always running around with no sense of direction. Since he's also always seems to be hungry he has probably been smoking "woolies" (that's crack mixed with pot). Porky the pig is so stupid, always being clumsy, and stuttering so I think he sniffed too many bags of glue, gasoline, or some other brain killing inhailant. Ren and Stimpy have some sort of acid connection. The weird thing is I don't think the characters are tripping but I do think the artist's who drew them are!! Droopy from Tom and Jerry with the slurring "Hi, my name's Droopy" plus with those nodding eyes definitely seems to be high on heroin. The 'toon network has a show called "Down wit Droopy D". The D ain't for nothing I bet! Elmer Fudd's a good old drunk as most hunters are. The Roadrunner is one hellious of a crystal meth or ice fiend - for obivious reasons. Maybe Wil E. Coyote giving him the wrong kind of bird seed or something which explains why the poor bastard can never catch Roadrunner. Daffy Duck I can't quite figure out- I mean does he pop amphethamines, freebase coke, or maybe tweek on cheap speed. Hmm... he probably fucking does all three at once for Goddess' sakes!! The Smurfs with that "La La La La La" singing shit and living in mushrooms are potheads beyond a doubt- fucking hippies! Popeye the Sailor Man always boasts about eating his spanich but he's skin popping steroids definitely. Scooby Doo and Shaggy took one sheet two many always being so paranoid and seeing ghosts all the time. The Decepticons from Transformers do the angel dust thing- for obivious reasons. Bug's Bunny another weird one to figure but he's probably on tranquilizers or Prozac. The Flintstones seem to be the only staright ones I can think of, probably because they're supposed to be living at a time before drugs were invented. And as for those Animaniatics only hell knows probably some halluncinogen the CIA cooked like BZ or something.